This can't be so

12

Huddled up in the corner of my cell I sit with my one blanket held desperately around me. Pillows pressed up against the concrete wall to cushion my leaning head. It has nearly been 9 weeks and still no Joker! He doesn't love me. He was dumping me, getting rid of me! Rubbing at my stomach I feel comfort in the small gesture. Suddenly I feel a sensation like butterflies...

"Hazel, is that you darling?" I whisper at my bump. I have decided if it's a girl I will call her Hazel. She has been my comfort in here, I sing to her, read stories I remember and talk to her about her daddy.

"Harley Quinn? Come with me." A figure I hadn't noticed in the door way calls to me. An overwhelming feeling of depression and the wish to stay put overtakes my senses but in order to keep my baby safe I have to be good. Forcing myself up I make my way to the figure, I just want my puddin' but he doesn't want me! The person moves from the door frame and takes my arm, why no cuffs? 

"Hurry, hurry." He says pulling me along quicker and quicker taking small glances down at his watch. I feel a sense of concern for my child, stress is not good for the baby. Shoved into a janitor closet a pair of earmuffs follow quickly behind and the door is slammed shut. Slightly confused I adjust the muffs until they are seating comfortably and pull my knees to my chest, well as close as they could be. Humming to myself there is a sudden muffled explosion, making me jump. What the hell is going on?! Screams and running feet surround me, desperately I hide behind a collection of buckets and rub circles on my stomach as if trying to comfort my baby. Shaking I hope for it to all be over soon. 

Seconds.

Minutes.

Silence.

The door is pulled open, light leaking in casting a shadow of a person. Silently begging for my child's life I pull myself closer and smaller right into the corner.

"Where is she?! I told you to put her in here!"

"Sir I did! I-" BANG, THUD. I sob escapes my mouth, the person who I presume did the shooting snaps their head in my direction.

"Harley?" Wait... I know that voice!

"Puddin'?" I splutter out still shaking.

"Harley get out here!" Pushing away the buckets I see my green haired boyfriend.

"Puddin'!" I squeal wrapping my arms around him, sobbing heavily.

"Lets go home."

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Dragging me through the building I see a mess of corpses, most staff and a few inmates.

Puddin' what took you so long?" I question still shaking.

"Don't ask questions!" He snaps pulling me along and out of the building. Once outside he hurries me into a black van filled with some of his hitmen, armed and splattered with blood.

"Go!" J shouts and the van jolts into fast pace movement. What feels like only moments later the van stops, J exits so I follow behind quickly.

"Come on Harleen." He grumbles waiting for me to close the door.

"Puddin' please can you tell me what took so long?" I question again resting my hands on my stomach as if to check Hazel was still there.

"You took me so long! You are pregnant!" He screams at me, smacking his hand against the steering wheel. The tears hadn't stopped and now they were just getting worse, doesn't he want the baby?

"What does that mean?" I choke out, wiping away a stray tear that was tickling my cheek.

"A child Harleen? A CHILD! We are never going to be a big happy family you stupid whore!" He continues screaming at me. Furious I can't help but scream in defeat.

"I'm sorry." I mumble

"Can you please answer my question properly?"

"Do you want this child?" He asks

"What?"

"Do you want this child?!"

"Yes." Stopping the car suddenly he strikes me hard across the cheek, furiously screaming at me. Covering my ears, tears still slipping down my cheeks now even worse. I need to get out of this situation but there is nothing I can do to escape, the car is going too fast and there is no way I can get out safely, it's too risky for Hazel.

"Then why did you come?" I wonder out loud, if he didn't want the baby surely he would just leave me there for the rest of the 9 months.

"Because... I'm in love." He admits much to my great surprise. In love?

"With you." He continues shyly. He has occasionally said he loves me but in love with me?

"And if you want this baby we will make it work but don't even think about settling down into a little cottage and being a stay at home mum while volunteering at the school." He hurries out. Excited I squeal and kiss his cheek, the hint of a smirk crosses his lips and I can't help but feel elated, I had doubted my puddin' but he has always been here for me and he truly loves me. We quickly arrive home... Wait home? Why are we home I thought he said we had to leave? What is he hiding from me and why is he hiding it?

"Puddin' I thought we had to leave? Don't we have to move?"

"No." He doesn't continue further and so I drop it, I don't want to spoil the moment for us.

"Come on, pooh." He says reaching out a hand and helping me out of the car. My bump feels even more prominent but I like it, I like the feeling of being a guardian of this life forming inside of me. I don't know what has changed in me but already I feel uplifted. Seeing our familiar home  I can't help but wish inside, the pure joy I feel towards the familiar scene, I was so used to being on show to everyone, puking in a bucket and being rushed out for cleaning when I become a mess of tears and vomit. Feeling arms wrap around my waist I relax in his arms.

"Lets go to our room." He whispers in my ear, god have I missed him.