Our Life Together

A Little Help Would be Nice

"Seriously, can you guys not do anything?"  Why did I get stuck living with 4 boys?  Why are the boys so helpless when it comes to any form of cleaning at all?

I pick up a pair of either Liam or Gabe's pants that have completely full pockets.  I shake them to reveal coins, a rubber band, an inch long completely useless pencil and a stick of gum.  All of which they know to take out of their pockets before putting their pants in the wash pile.  These kids are so lucky they're cute.

Brad walks into the laundry room right after, handing me his sweatshirt and throwing our bed sheets on the floor.  The washer is literally a foot away from him, completely empty and open, and he threw the sheets on the floor.

"Really, Brad!?!" I'm getting very annoyed very quickly.  He looks over at me completely clueless "What?  I brought the wash to the laundry room."

"I've done 5 loads of wash already today.  I put them in the washer, moved them to the dryer and even folded most of it because our children are incapable of doing anything other than making messes!  The least you could do is put them in the freaking washer!"

"Kids!"  He turns his head slightly to yell "Get in here!  We pissed off your mother again!"  They all run into the room staring back and forth between Brad and I.  Olivia gets sick of standing and jumps right on top of the pile of sheets to play with them.

I ignore her and hand Liam and Gabe their baskets of unfolded laundry.  The look at me like I'm crazy for doing so and stand there clueless.

"I'm sick of taking care of you guys like you're babies.  You 10 and 12, you can fold your own damn laundry."

"But Jack and Liv don't have to fold theirs!"  Gabe fights "This isn't fair."

"Jack and Liv are too young to fold theirs.  They will do other things to help me around here.  I'm not going to keep doing everything for all of you while you sit on the couch all day."

They drag their baskets out of the room in defeat.  Brad starts to follow, thinking he doesn't have to do anything.

"Where do you think you're going?" I stop him.

"Well I was gonna go back into the living room, but I guess you have something better for me to do here." 

"Yeah."  I hand him all the leftover wash and grab Olivia and Jackson "You get to finish all of that.  Have fun."

I walk with them into the living room where their toys are currently scattered all over the room.  Dolls and monster trucks have taken over the spots designated for couch cushions and TV remotes.  They have a tiny, barley noticeable trail that we can walk through to get to their fort.

"Let's clean up your toys.  Mommy can hardly walk in here."  I think of a game we can play to trick them into cleaning "Whoever has their stuff cleaned up quickest gets an extra cookie after dinner!" 

They look at me like I just offered them a million dollar prize.  I have never seen their little legs run around this room so quickly.  The best part is that while they're running around like maniacs, their toys are disappearing into their toy boxes.  Half of Olivia's are in Jack's box, and his in hers, but that's a problem for later when they fight over them.  For now, I just want to enjoy the sight of a semi clean living room.

It's all a great sight until I get nailed in the arm by a thrown car.

"Sorry, mommy!"  Jack runs over to pick it up.  He quickly throws it right into his box and goes back to everything else.  I sit there laughing at them, secretly hoping this "game" works a while longer.  If all it takes for a clean living room is an extra cookie they can have it every day.

"I done!"  Olivia announces.  She pulls me up and walks around the room to show me that all her toys are away.  Jack finishes seconds later, showing me that all his toys are away as well.  They stand there for a little arguing over who gets the extra cookie, while I face the fact that I now have to actually make dinner for all of us.

"You ordered pizza?  Again?"  Brad is not happy at all with my choice of dinner "We just had pizza yesterday.  Why didn't you make spaghetti or grilled cheese?"

"Because I'm too tired to cook right now.  All I had to do for this was call and order it." I carry the boxes over to the table to help everyone get their food "If you aren't happy with it make your own food."

"Mommy?"  Liv tugs on my pants leg "Cookie!"  She waits very impatiently for me to walk over to the cupboard and get the cookie.  I hand it to her and she runs back over to the table, splitting it in half so that Jack can have the other half.

"That's why the little two are my favorite."  I lean over towards Brad watching the kids "They're so nice and innocent.  The only thing they leave in their pants pockets are Legos, and occasionally pet food, but that's better than gum."

"They take after you more than me."  He admits looking towards Liam and Gabe, who are flicking peparonies across the table at each other "Those two need some kind of help.  Like those dog obedience schools, but for kids."

"We are not sending our children to obedience school."  I shake my head laughing at his ridiculous idea "They'd get kicked out and then we'd be all over the news for it.  The last thing we need is to be told by tabloids that we suck at being parents."

"Well, I mean if they get kicked out we must be doing something wrong." He jokes.

"Babe, we're doing this all wrong.  We don't know one thing about this whole parenting thing."