He keeps me warm - Harry Styles fanfic(Editing/Not Complete)

chapter 13~ promise not to fall in love with me

"here let me grab your coat" he says to me as i begin to rise from my chair. "haha merci!" i say thank you to him in french and then start to walk out of this beautiful restaurant. "so did you like your meal?" he aks "yes i did than-" i try "and did you like the seats?" he asks worried "yeah i did Har-" i try again "and i'm sure you like the style?" he asks. "yeah i did bu-" i try once again. "and did you think the french words were a little cheesy?" he asks but before he tries again i stop him, "Yes!! wait no! i meant no..ahh! Harry it was great....it was all perfect, you getting to my house on time, the red rose, the french words,the french food! i mean come on!?!? it was amazing and look at you...your all worried when you really shouldn't be, this night has been perfect...your perfect" i say all in a breath. " you really think i'm perfect?" he asks me holding my hand. "mhmm" i say nervous but trying to look brave. "the only perfect one here is you Beth" he says stopping us from walking. He slowy pushes me up against a tree and then does the unexpected. 

He softly plants a kiss on my parted lips. His lips are wet and i feel his breathing rise slowly through his nostrils. He soft cheek rubbing against mine feels exilerating and tingly. I've never felt anything like this before. He then slowly leaves a wet trail of kisses down my neck, making the butterflys in my stomach flutter like crazy. My stomach ties a knot and i begin to moan softly. He reacts to the moan and then puts a finger on to my mouth signiling the shush. "it sounds beautiful and believe me i want to here it all day but i tink we should save that for the bed" in my mind right now i can see us doing things, crazy things and i never thought i would do them with Harry but my mind is telling me that he's the one but that has to stay a secret. He can't know that. This is our first date. Even though that kiss was infact amazing i think i should stop thinking like this. It's wrong and i don't deserve Harry. He's to good for me. And i think i may start to feel like falling in love with him but i can't. He doesn't know my secret. My biggest secret of all. I'm to afraid to say it. I can't tell him not him, not Nat not anyone. My parents know but they swore they'd never tell. 

I have to tell him soon. This can't be happening though. Wait! why am i thinking this? he doesn't even love me! why shoudl i be worried. "Beth!" harry yells. "yes." i say looking into his eyes worried. Did i black out or? "you completely zoned out and i don't think you understood what i said" he says. "oh sorry Harry, i was thinking....what did you say?" i ask curious. "well i have this thing i've been trying  tell you for quite a while now and-" oh god. I cut him off. I put my finger on his lips signiling for hi to shush. "whatever it is you have to promise not to fall in love with me" i say sadly. "wait what? i mean..wait.why?" he asks kind of heartbroken. "i might have to tell you another day Harry, i don't want to ruin our date" i say basically shedding a tear. I now know i have feelings for him...strong and people say love hurts and it's true i'm just to scared of what the doctors are going to say.