23. When He Is Gone...

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I Have deleted the rape chapter I have stolen from someone else's work, there is more information about that at the end of the story. Sorry about that because I couldn't bear stealing work that wasn't mine, I felt very guilty, but if you guys want a lemon or even a rape read, go find a smut fanfic about Jeff. I don't feel ready to do smuts yet. Please respect my decision. If you're lost in this chapter and have any questions, ask in the comments. Hope you understand. (P.S And yes, I know I skipped 22 because I deleted it and can't be bothered changing the rest of the numbers.)

I've lost count of how many minutes have passed. How many hours. How many days. How many weeks. I haven't seen Jeff much at all. He hardly feeds me anymore. He only feeds me 3 times a week. He only gives me a plate of flesh and leaves without saying one word. I don't eat the flesh of course. I'm not sick like him. Not even if I spend hours crying and screaming his name. I've grown thin and bony. My bones showing so easily. I was looking like a skeleton. I was sure I would become a skeleton in a limited time. I was surprised I had lasted this long. Although he has raped me, tortured me, killed my loved ones, kidnapped me, I can't help but start to miss him. I haven't had anyone to speak to for Lord knows how long and it's killing me. I feel like a prisoner. An animal. A creature that doesn't belong to this world.

What have I truly done to deserve this? Why me out of all people? When will all this pain end? Will this Hell ever end? So many question tore at me. Myself drowning in my own questions that were desperate to answered. Curiosity killed the cat they say but the cat has 8 more lives.

I was stuck in this room that I was raped in. It was cold, dark and dull. It was exactly what a prison cell was like. There was only a queen sized bed with blood stained blankets and nothing more. It was indescribable to describe how boring and painful it was to live in such a place. I hated it. That was the only word that crossed my mind.

Hate.

I spent many hours doing nothing, sleeping, thinking, weeping, screaming and all that repeated. I thought of how I fell into Jeff's hands so easily. How my ex betrayed me and took me back to Jeff. He was an idiot to think that Jeff wouldn't kill him. I wept for my friends' deaths, how Jeff killed them with feeling any regret. I wanted revenge but I knew he was far stronger than me. I was no match for him.

Me and him both knew that.

I sat in the corner of the room, hugging my my knees and crying. I've been crying to much. I'm growing weak. Or was I always weak? No. I have to stop these thoughts. I need to get out of here. But how? I'm starting to break. I'm going insane. Is this Jeff's plan? Well, I won't give up. Not yet. Not ever.

How long will Jeff leave me to rot in here? More weeks? Years? Why me? Why not anyone else? I don't want any par in this?!

All these thoughts powered my fuel to my anger.

All of a sudden, anger took over me. I sprung to my feet and threw a punch at the wall with all my power. I threw more and more punches at the concrete wall, not taking any notice to the pain. Thinking about the pain makes you week. When I lost count of all my punches, my anger died down and I fell to my knees. I gasped at the sight of my hands. They were covered in blood.

My blood.

Why did I do that? Am I really going insane? Did I seriously let anger take over me? I'm so foolish. Jeff wants me to break and I'm letting him. No.


'Just hold out, Y/N. Just wait for Jeff to return, then we'll speak to him. Just wait out Y/N. Just hold on.

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