The Sister Of Popular

Chapter Thirty

Thomas?

What the hell was he doing here?

I concentrated on dying. I wanted to die, and with tears running down my face, I was swallowing the disgusting painkillers. I didn't have pills very often, but now, I was swallowing about twenty. 

I wasn't going to fail this time.

Die.

Die.

Die.

Die.

Die.

Rid myself of my life already.

Hurry up and die.

Swallow the pills.

Die.

Die.

"Lexi! Let me in! Lexi, it's me, Tommy! My name is Thomas Walkers, and I am in love with you so please get your arse out of there before I try and test what I learnt from that general knowledge book from Year Seven about picking locks."

I tried to ignore Thomas, and concentrating on getting these pills down my throat. Concentrating on dying.

Wait.

"I am in love with you".

What?

And then I started choking out of shock, and stabbing myself multiple times in my head for being such a stupid idiot, I had to lean forwards and cup my hand over my mouth to keep the pills in. 

I couldn't stay alive again!

Then I realised that I was no longer blocking the door anymore, and I heard even more slamming and crashing, and then someone walked in.

"Lexi! Lexi! Lexi-Lex, stop it! Spit those out! Now!"

Thomas sounded hysterical, and he tried to rip my arm away from my face. I fought back as I sensed the rest of my family rushing in as well.

"Get off me!" I screamed, trying to slap Thomas away. I still had a few pills in my mouth - that must be enough to overdose on and kill myself on? 

"No! I won't!" Thomas started shaking me, and I could make out my mum and Aiden calling out to me as well, but I wasn't listening. I was concentrating on trying to swallow the pills.

I had already had two painkillers. Maybe a third one would do the trick...

"Get those stupid pills out of your mouth!" Thomas squeaked, and started violently slapping the back of my neck. And then violently slapping my back. And then violently slapping every part of me, until I got ridiculously frustrated with him.

"Go away! Let me die! Go awa-"

I then realised that I had, without noticing, spit out every last pill and I was sure that two pills wasn't an overdose.

Crap.

Crap.

I automatically tried to reach for the pills to shove them back into my mouth, except now, every single person in the house was holding onto me to stop me. 

"Stop it! Stop it! I want to go away! Stop! Let me out!" I screeched, fidgeting in their hold, but then Aiden was gathering up each and every painkiller, and throwing them out of the window. "Give me them back! I'm not going to live any longer! You do know I can just stab myself to death, you can't-"

"Lex," Levi said quietly. "You can't, because I won't let you."

I was about to carry on my rant, but the waterworks came back all over again, and now all I could do was sob uncontrollably at my failure of existing on the whole damn planet.