Exposed

Chapter VIII: Room Getaway

Chapter Eight: Room Getaway.

Jake is standing out of my door. With a bouquet of flowers, one of his hands in his pocket. He looks shy as if it's the first time he's at my door. His hair is disheveled and his cheeks are a tad flushed from the almost cold winter wind outside. He looks deadbeat tired like me and I am suddenly aware of how this gap between us is affecting him as much as it's affecting me. Seeing him here is definitely a surprise after our small conversation this morning. His appearance -- after saying he wouldn't be able to come -- has certainly lessened part of the ache in my heart. It demonstrates how even when we're fighting he still feels the need to please me.

"Am I late?" Jake quietly asks.

I shake my head, opening the door more and inviting him. "No, come in." He starts removing his coat and I reach for the flowers. "Let me have them. I'll put them in water." He hands the bouquet to me and I walk to the kitchen, looking for a vase.

I don't know how dinner is going to work. I don't want our black cloud to settle over the table and make dinner uncomfortable. Our misunderstandings are something we should keep between us, not make them noticeable to others. Not that it would matter since Dad and Carter already know something's not right but, Abby is here and making her uncomfortable during her first dinner with us unpleasant is something I'm not aiming to achieve. I'm finishing filling the vase with water when Jake enters the kitchen. My back is to him but my body always recognizes his presence.

"I know I said I wouldn't be able to make it but Mark gave me the afternoon off and I knew your parents were expecting me. I didn't want to disappoint them." He explains.

"It's okay. I'm sure Mom will be glad to see you." I say.

We stay silent as I put the flowers into the water-filled vase, arranging them beautifully. I don't know what to say. After not having him here, most of the day and being alone in the apartment, I was able to notice how I'm not controlling my jealousy as much as I'd like to. Part of it is what has Jake and me in this situation. It's something I've been working on since we started dating but clearly I'm not doing it right because he already left. "You packed your stuff." I point out, not thinking about my words. As much as his answer might hurt, I want to know why.

"Yeah," is the only thing he says before sighing and speaking again. "I can't stay here and sleep in our bed alone, Sky. You can't expect me not to find it painful while you sleep across the hall. So close yet so far."

I nod, my eyes brimming with tears. I understand the way he feels because I feel the same way, too. But I wasn't expecting it to be a good enough reason for him to leave.

"I'll pick up the rest of my stuff this weekend."

That's it. That's all it takes for me to start crying. A strangled sob escapes my throat as my hand goes to my mouth. Even though my back is to him, I know he notices my shoulders shaking as I try to control myself. "Sky?" He says. He's leaving me and there's no one else to blame for this but me. My jealousy started the fight. My jealousy did this. My jealousy and my brain. My brain, like always. I force myself to recover quickly, cleaning my cheeks from the streaks of tears. I take a deep breath before holding the vase and turning around.

"We should go to the table. They're waiting for us." I inform him, walking out of the kitchen.

I set the vase with the flowers on the coffee table of the living room before walking to the dining table. Jake stops me, his hand holding my forearm as we stand between the arch of concrete that separates the living room and dining room. "Do they know we... you know?" He questions, timidly.

"Mom is a little oblivious about it but Dad and Carter have a vague idea that something is up." I tell him.

He nods before letting me go. I enter the dining room, all heads turning to us. "I'm sorry we took so long."