Kiss the Girl: A Chris Evans Fanfiction

33.

I got back to LA and within three weeks I was officially unemployed. I was sitting on the precipice of having a full blown anxiety event about it. Chris had to shoot a film in Prague but was called into the studio to film an after credits bit to the Avengers first. I followed along, not really knowing who I even was anymore.

I didn't just stay by his side though. I kind of flew in and out because my dress fittings were becoming more regular, and I needed to go to Australia and do things there. I met with bakers to finalise cake designs and flavours. I helped Amelia find a dress. We checked the boat and decorations and so many things really. I was losing track of things and finding everything overwhelming. I was finding myself going out and realising that I'd forgotten to brush my teeth or brush my hair. I just felt constantly under stress and that if things didn't change soon, I'd break.

Comic-con came and I went with Gaby. She brought her new boyfriend with her. His name was James, and he was a dream. I really, truly liked him. He was charming and funny and sweet and best of all he made Gaby happy. Her happiness radiated out of her when she was around him. Gaby and I also went and spoke to Lucy who sketched up the design for a stunning dress for Gaby. It would be asymmetric with a layered chiffon knee length skirt and a black satin sash. She assured us she would source the fabrics from sustainable fair trade sellers.

When Chris came back from Prague, we went to Boston together and made a concerted effort to find our new house. We must have looked at twenty houses. It was like we both needed this place to be perfect. This was where we would raise our kids. The family home those kids would come back to when they were adults with their own kids at Christmas. It had to be their dream place. Turns out, those are few and far between.

I woke up on a Wednesday morning of mid-August feeling horrible. I'd been feeling sick on and off for a couple of weeks now. The stress was going to kill me I was sure of it. I got out of bed reluctantly to go have a shower. We were meeting a real estate agent who was going to show us three houses in Brookline today. Chris said it was where a lot of the Red Sox lived with a great deal of excitement. I tried to pretend that I cared for him.

I hopped into the shower, wondering if maybe we should call it off. I just couldn't do it anymore. It was eating me up. We'd decided to do too many things. It felt like I was on planes as much as I was on the ground and this needed to wait. I found Chris already dressed and cooking breakfast with Lisa. They had bacon cooking, a smell I was never a fan of. It sent a wave of nausea through me and I dashed out the back door and threw up over the porch railing into the garden.

Chris came out behind me and pulled my hair back. He rubbed my back, but by the time he'd gotten there I'd already finished.

"Stress? Or are you actually sick?" He asked.

"Stress. We get married in 4 weeks, Chris. Why are we fucking looking at houses?" I said. "We should have gotten married in Boston. What was I thinking?" And just like that, I was crying.

He wrapped his arms around me and held me while I let it out. I'd been holding it in for a while now. Just letting everything eat away at me.

"Shh... You're right. I've been thinking the same thing. Do you think you can handle going out today? I'll cancel all the other appointments we have after today and we'll just sort it out after the honeymoon." Chris soothed.

"Really?" I asked, rubbing my eyes with the balls of my hand.

"Yeah, of course. We have time." He kissed the top of my head. It suddenly felt like a weight had been taken off my shoulders and now I didn't even mind going to look at houses anymore.

"Sorry. I am so up in my head right now." I said.

Chris laughed. "Don't worry, babe. If anyone gets it, it's me."