Reflection of Perfection | NaNoWriMo 2016 ( severe editing)

2 4 : n i g h t m a r e s · a n d · f a n t a s y

Paris: 

I don't know where I am, but it's screaming destruction and ruins. "Hello?" I rasp, looking around, and finding no one. This wasteland is barren, but off in the distance? I see a figure, standing atop a fallen building. This, I realize, is not a wasteland, but a ruins of a great city. From the fallen statues of rulers, I can only assume that this is Sabosa, one of the great border cities. My feet involuntarily start moving, and I relieve, but I, too, am curious.

As I get closer, I see that the figure- a girl, is gripping a long sword. The sharp stench of magic fills the air as I get closer, and as I'm near, I see dark black whipping in the wind. The hair color, I realize, is a dye, and streaks of natural blond peak out from the midnight colored hair. "Ma'am?" I call, my heart filling with dread. 

And, without even turning, she hears me over the sound of cries and pleas and a claw of darkness seizes me and throws me into the sky. The wind is in my eyes- I cannot see anything, and at this moment, the only thing on my mind is falling. I always had a fear of falling, and this was definitely no exception. But this girl is not done with me. I sense that she is calling on lightning, the way I had taught her. 

Right before the bolt hits me with volts of electricity, I- 

I sat up, panting heavily, sweat drenching my bare chest. Recently, more and more of these dreams plague the long nights and I would be forced to wake up, half scared out of my wits. I assumed that these dreams were warning signs. I had to stop Evelyn before it was too late, before she would destroy the world. And who knew, maybe her crazy bitch of a sister would assist her. 

As certain as I was about Evelyn's future, the growing feeling I had that maybe I was wrong. But then again, it could always be guilt.  

"You're awake," Elsa noted quietly, sitting up. We had relapsed into our routine of sleeping next to each other. As often of these dreams I had of Evelyn, as often Elsa awoke from nightmares that her sister was being tortured. 

We sought solace in each other's company, and though we both refused to admit this, the nightmares weren't as bad whenever I slept next to Elsa. "What's wrong?" Elsa's quiet murmur drifted to me, as I stared into the semi darkness of the room. I had the drapes of the balcony windows drawn so some moonlight entered. Tonight was unusually clear. 

"Nightmares, again," I said quietly, not looking at Elsa. She might have been one of the only people I dared confined in. And then, as if to add on to my sour mood, my thoughts drifted to Helena. 

Helena, whose pretty face was alluring, who I had fallen for. Maybe I was a fool to open up my heart to that heartbreaking witch, but I wouldn't say I regretted this. "What are you thinking about?" Elsa asked me, so unlike the times where she'd fall back into the pillows and into a restless slumber. 

"Helena," I said, if only because I didn't care to lie to Elsa. Lady Helena of Vona had left her fiance, a Duke, for me. At the time, I thought she loved me. But what she did to me... I would never forget. 

Elsa leaned against my shoulder, "Do you regret her?" 

It took a while for me to answer, "Yes," I answered. 

Vona, a great region in the Spring Realm was but a pile of rubber to this day, because of me. Because of my wraith. 

Elsa summoned a sole snowflake that lit up a bit, and I smiled fondly. I had remembered teaching Elsa that, after she had that incident with Anna. 

"Do you regret us?" Her voice was now hushed, like we were telling a secret. I pushed back the painful memories of Helena to remember the time when Elsa and I dated. "Never," I whispered, almost automatically. But we had broken up anyways. Elsa, who was so broken from Anna's death, and I, who was so broken from Helena's poisonous influence, couldn't heal each other. We began an unhealthy relationship, and eventually realized that we weren't right for each other, because were so dependent on each other. 

But I regretted nothing. 

"Elsa. When are you going back to Arendelle?" I asked suddenly, disrupted the serenity of the night. 

"Tomorrow," she said it confidently, but had a hint of desperation that begged me to let her stay. 

"Elsa, your people need you. Olaf and Kristoff can't run Arendelle for long. If you can't do it for me, do it for the people of Arendelle." My reasoning seemed to strengthen her will and the ice queen dropped a nod. 

And yet, she still stayed awake. 

"What is it?" I rasped, turning to look at the pale, lonely figure next to me. 

Elsa played with the strands of her pale blond hair, "I'm going to miss you. Arendelle just reminds me of Anna you know, and I miss her so goddamn much. I never wanted to be Queen you know. The people of Arendelle don't love me, they love Anna. I was going to hand down my throne to Anna... but she died." Her voice cracked at the end, and I instinctively wrap my hands around Elsa, and felt her broken spirit lean into mine. 

Before I could wrap my mind around what happened, Elsa's lips were on mine. "Please, make me feel something," she breathed against my lips. And I lost all reason as I returned the kiss, realizing that some part of me did love her, a part that had not been corrupted by Helena, a part that had stayed hidden deep within me. Until now. 

a/n: because for camp nano, my goal is 30k words in a month. I will be writing quantity over quality and will begin editing these chapters at the beginning of May. please bare with me and my grammer mistakes and small plot holes. 

Thank you :)