Secrets And Lies

Episode 9

After that night things between them got better, Demi still struggled every day with the guilt she felt for the accident. Leo was paitent with her when needed and just listened when she wanted to talk. He advised her to try to get back to work, Demi started writing what she felt which ultimately turned into a whole album.

During this time frame she locked herself in a room with her guitar and wrote for hours and hours at a time. Leo would leave around seven in the morning and return home around nine and she'd still be in the same spot head deep into her notebook.

Leo was leaving out again, he had a doctor's appointments with a plastic surgeon he was looking into his sex reassignment surgery. It was just a consult and still he felt sick to his stomach with nerves.

Dressed in an ironed polo button up and old Navy jeans. Leo adjusted his  collar and styled his hair accordingly.

"What are you all dressed up for?" Demi smirked, helping him with his collar. His fingers were fumbling with the first button because of nerves.

He had no problem discussing with her, after his appointment. He needed to go alone and he knew that if he told Demi she would assist on going. He wasn't comfortable with that just yet so he did what anyone would do in his situation he lied. "A staff brunch to celebrate the new release. Nothing special."

"Hmm, " she hummed, searching his eyes for anything that would give him away which she didn't find. "You never get dressed up for work lunches in all the time we've been together."

"Needed a change." Leo pecked her cheek slipping his arms into his leather jacket. "Talk to you later? I'll call when it's over."

Leo left the house without another word, briskfully walking to his bike and riding out into the street. He hoped all went well and he got good news.

Leo arrived to the building parking his bike on the far end of the lot. He needed the walk to clear his head and shake off all the feelings that were swarming his head.

This was a huge step for him.  He had been researching and saving up for this surgery for so long. Debating on if he had actually wanted to do it.

He just couldn't see himself living the way he was for the rest of his life. Demi made him feel whole. She took care of him when his disphorbia got the best of him and made him question his entire being.

All of that just didn't change the fact that when he looked in the mirror the reflection staring back at him wasn't something he was proud of.

Leo signed in anxiously playing with the him of his shirt before he was called back to a room almost right away.

He was asked a serious of questions about his T shots and overall how he felt health wise occasionally fumbling with his words then awkwardly laughing it off.

After the nurses left his doctors greeted him with a warm smile. "Morning Leo who are you feeling today." he sat on his swivel chair.

Leo shrugged, before answering. "Scared."

Dr. Daniels nodded, "That's completely normal giving the circumstances your about to make a huge decision." He wrote down a few things. "Is there anyone here to support you today?"

Leo shook his head, Demi popping in his mind. "No, I'm here by myself my girlfriend doesn't know I'm here."

Dr. Daniels frowned substantially. "You don't think this is something you should discuss together?"

Leo shifted nervously guilt creeping up on him. "I just.. I don't want her to see me differently and I just feel weird talking about down there with anyone let alone my girlfriend."

"Your concerns are valid." Dr. Daniels agrees, "But you shouldn't have to deal with the weight of this decision by yourself. She supports you yes? Just talk to her about it and be a hundred percent sure you want this."

Leo took everything his doctor was saying in consideration and after talking to him thoroughly about his fears and concerns he rescheduled his appointent promising to return with his girlfriend.

Leo drove home with a lot on his mind, thankfully demi's car was still outside telling him she didn't leave for the studio yet.

"Babe?" He called shutting the door behind him.

"In here." Demi voice sounded from the t.v. room where she sat watching the ID channel deeply invested.

Leo walked over kissing the top of her head before reaching for the remote switching the tv off. "We need to talk."

Demi stiffened turning to face him,genuinely scared he was about to break up with her. "What's going on leo?"

"I lied." He spulttered out quickly watching her eyes crinkle in confusion. "There was no staff brunch I went to the doctors."

Demi settled back in the chair her heart racing as she tried to form words. "A-Are you sick?"

Leo shook his head putting his hands in hers. "No babe, I'm not sick I went to get a consult on a sex reassignment surgery."

There it was. The bomb had dropped exploding into millions of pieces. Demi said nothing for several moments her brain a jumbled mess as his words echoed around her.

She wasn't familiar with SRS but what she did know and hear about it. It was very painful, expensive and had a long recovery.

"I know I should've told you but I was scared. This is a life changing decision that I'm making and your the most important thing to me I want your support and in put on it." He said, tears building in his eyes. Leo didn't have many secrets but this was definitely one of them.

"Will this make you happy?" she questioned, switching her position so she was sitting almost on his lap never breaking eye contact. "You will always be Leo to me, my Leo. I don't care what you have in your pants I'll love you regardless. And if this is something you really want I'll support you babe you know that. You don't have to hide these things from me its okay come here."

Leo brought demi closer, his head buried in her chest as his tears soaked his shirt. "I love you so much demi."