I met Rammstein?

What do I really want?

I stand, leaning against the wall. At first, I have no idea what to do. The tears just fall. Richard stands there like a bit of an idiot. I don't think he was expecting me to start crying.

"Leave me alone." I whisper. He takes one last look and leaves me be.

I slump onto the cold and damp pavement and put my head in my hands. What do I do? Do I tell Schneider? Do I even love Schneider? Do I want to be with Richard instead?

My mind was getting flooded with questions I didn't even think I'd have to answer. I sigh. I stand up and head back into the pub before anyone starts asking questions.

"Hey." I bump straight into Schneider.

"Oh, I'm sorry." I say, looking at the floor, trying to hide my bloodshot eyes.

"It's alright." He replies. "I just came to check how you are. Richard said you were outside, is everything alright?" He asks concerned.

"Everything's fine." I say, trying to get past.

"Have you been crying?" He questions.

"No, no," I lie. "I said, everything is fine." But I get the sense he doesn't believe me.

We head inside and sit back down at our table with Till. Paul and Richard are nowhere to be seen, but we can hear their drunken laughs in the distance. For the remainder of the night, Schneider continously glances at me with a worried expression on his face. We check ourselves into a B&B along with the others. Our rooms are all on the same floor, so we head up together.

"Here, do you want me to take that?" Schneider offers.
"No, it's alright," I reply. "I can manage."
We head up to our room and unlock the door. Inside is a double bed, an en suite and a mini fridge. I put my bag beside the window and flop down onto the bed, removing the uncomfortable parts of my costume. Schneider looks around our room before heading to the fridge and getting an ice cold bottle of water. He sits on the sofa and switches on the tv. Just then there's a knock at the door.
"Come in." Schneider calls out.
Paul's grinning face pops round the door. "Who's up for a game of spin the bottle?" He hiccups.
Schneider looks over at me and I shrug my shoulders.
"Sure, why not?" He replies.
We leave our room and head over to Till's.
"Hey Katja! Sit next to me." Paul calls and pulls me onto the floor. Opposite me is Richard and next to him is Till. On the other side of me is Schneider.
"So, who goes first?" Richard asks.
"Till. As we're in his room." Schneider casually says.
"Alright," Till answers and spins the bottle. "Paul... truth or dare?"
"Dare. Truths are boring." He laughs.
"Alright," Till ponders. "I dare you to go outside and tell the first person you see that you love them."
"That's too easy!" Paul chuckles and makes his way outside.
Everyone stands up and looks out the window. We see Paul standing around awkwardly for a few minutes before a random stranger appears from round the corner.
"I LOVE YOUU!" Paul shouts. The man looks around him confused and hurriedly walks off.
Paul comes back into the room and sits back down on the floor, chuckling.
"Okay, my turn." Paul spins the bottle and it begins to slow. It eventually stops, pointing at me.
"Katja! Truth or dare?" He asks excitedly.
"I guess I'll go for... truth." I reply.
Paul sighs, "I had a really good dare for you!" Paul turns and faces me. "Something I've always wondered about you is... how many people have you slept with?"
I look down at my hands and meekly say "One."
Paul smiles and tells me it's my turn to spin the bottle. I spin it and it stops at Schneider.
"Truth or dare, Schneider?" I ask.
"Dare." He grins.
"I dare you to... pour a beer over someone and then lick it off." I laugh.
Schneider goes over to the fridge and grabs a can of beer, and pours it over me. He then proceeds to lick it off my face and I sense he feels pretty uncomfortable right now.
"Sorry." I whisper in his ear. He smiles    before placing his hand on the bottle. "The next person must kiss someone they haven't kissed before." He announces and spins the bottle. The bottle stops, facing towards Richard. He looks from one person to another before his eyes stop at mine. He then gets up and it feels like my heart has stopped, but then his eyes move towards Schneider.
"Seeing as you were the one who chose this dare, Schneider, I chose you." He smirks.
Schneider seems to squirm under our apprehensive stares. Richard plants a quick kiss on Schneider's lips before returning to his place.
"Um... I'm feeling quite tired," Schneider waffles. "I think I'll go to bed now. Good night." He says and quickly leaves the room.
"I think I'll go after him," I say, gesturing towards the door. "Night."
I leave the room and head across the corridor, to our room. However, inside there is no sign of Schneider.
"Schneider?" I call out.
Suddenly, I hear a knock at the door. "Schneider? Are you in there?" Richard sheepishly questions.
I go towards the door and open it.
"Oh... Katja." Richard says a little awkwardly.
Richard walks in and stands in the middle of the room. I close the door and turn to face him.
"Er... can we talk about earlier?" He asks. "Seeing as I've got you alone."
"What is there to say?" I reply.
"Well... it was a mistake, right? I mean... what I'm trying to say is, you didn't want that did you?" He mumbles.
"No, I didn't." I say, but honestly, I don't know what I want anymore.
Richard studies my face and walks closer.
"Are you sure about that?" He queries.
I don't get a chance to respond because his lips have already made contact with mine, and unlike before, I give in to temptation. Something feels different this time. Before I realise what's happening, I've been pushed onto the bed, Richard on top of me.
"I can see in your eyes that you're begging me for more." He whispers.
Although I hate to be a cheat, deep down, I know he's right.