I'm Sorry...

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You thought that you weren't supposed to remember everything the second you woke up.
In all of those dramas and movies where someone ends up in a hospital, they wake up and can't remember anything for a good five hours, but it wasn't like that for you.
You knew exactly where you were the moment you opened your eyes.
Sure you were a little disoriented and your head was a little fuzzy from pain, but you knew who you were and where you were and what had happened.
You knew that you took a bullet to save an idiot who didn't think to trust you.
The colors in the room were soft and comforting but couldn't cover up the chemically-burning smell of a hospital. There was a soft beeping and a warm hand holding yours. You thought vaguely that is was Taehyung. His hands were too slender to be Hoseok's and too big to be Jimin's.
You opened your eyes and looked, finding yourself to be right.
Taehyung was asleep in the chair beside your hospital bed with your hand clasped loosely in his. Behind him, Jae, Hoseok and Jin were leaning against each other on the sofa passed out. Jungkook and Namjoon were in chairs in the corners of the room, their long frames curled up in uncomfortable-looking positions.
It must have been late at night, considering that everyone but you was dead asleep.
Jimin and Yoongi were nowhere to be found.
You sighed and shook Taehyung's hand a little to wake him. Grumbling, he let go of your hand and layed back in the chair.
You snorted.
Typical Taehyung.
The sound of your amusement made Jin's eyes flutter open and he rubbed them, looking blearily at you. He blinked again.
"Y/N! You're awake!" He jumped up, disturbing Jae and Hoseok on the couch. The two of them followed suit and yelled your name but lowered their voices when they saw your pained grimace. Namjoon joined your little party that was gathered behind the sleeping figure of your friend.
Throughout the entire commotion, neither Taehyung or Jungkook stirred once.
"Where's Hani?" That was the first thing you could ask. After you took the bullet from her gun, she disappeared from your memory.
Namjoon's face tightened and he said, "She's dead."
Dead.
You felt almost guilty at the wave of relief that swamped you when you heard the news. She caused an innumerable amount of problems for not only you, but probably other people too.
"Is everyone okay?" you whispered. "Where's Yoongi oppa? And Sehun? And..."
You trailed off, struggling to force his name out of your mouth.
You didn't want to think about what he had done.
"Jimin's in the hall," Jin said gently. "He's blaming himself. He said that if he came in, he was afraid you wouldn't wake up because of him."
"He's a coward," you heard Jae mutter under her breath.
You silently agreed.
"Everybody else is fine. Yoongi's outside with Jimin and Sehun..." Jin stopped abruptly, blinking. "Actually, I have no clue where Sehun is."
Namjoon cut in. "The last time I saw him, he was chasing some little man in a suit out of the warehouse. He ran by before I could stop him."
There was a man in a suit with Hani.
You frowned worriedly.
Sehun probably was trying to follow him because of Baekhyun. Baekhyun might be alive.
"We have to find him," you mumbled.
There was a timid knock on the door and it opened slightly. Yoongi's head popped in and he smiled at seeing you awake.
"Y/N," he said. "How do you feel?"
You shrugged and grinned weakly. "Like I've been shot."
Snorting, the older boy tapped his fingers hesitantly on the door.
"Jimin wants to see you," he said slowly. "Should I let him in?"
No.
You really didn't want to see his face again, maybe ever, because soulmate or not he chose Hani over you.
Again.
You remembered yelling at him to move as she threatened him with that gun, and his outright refusal to listen to and trust you. Why? Because he was so convinced that Hani wouldn't hurt him. Because he ignored the obvious signs in order to give his girlfriend, who had already drugged and kidnapped you, a last chance to redeem herself.
Because he still loved her and he stopped loving you.
However, you had to talk to him eventually. You were still neighbors after all.
"You can let him in," you told Yoongi quietly.  He grimaced and disappeared into the hallway for a moment, returning with a hesitant blonde boy trailing behind him.
You observed Jimin with a tired sigh.
He was pale and there were large black circles under his eyes, hair a mess of sticking-up strands. The front of his shirt was wrinkled and twisted like he has been wringing his hands in it. His full lips were compressed into a thin, flat line.
Staring at the ground, he hesitantly entered the room.
You gave Jin a subtle motion with your head to indicate that you wanted to have this talk alone. He obligingly took the others by the arms and dragged them out, leaving Jungkook and Taehyung as they were, which was dead to the world.
They closed the door behind them and left you and Jimin alone.
There was silence after that.
You could tell that Jimin was unsure of himself and didn't want to speak first but you sure as heck weren't going to give him any help.
You sat up a little in the bed and crossed your arms over your chest.
You waited.
He started out by opening his mouth, then raised his hands in a sort of pleading gesture. "Y/N-"
Nope.
Even the sound of your name coming out of his mouth was too much to bear.
"Do you believe me now?" you laughed without amusement, cutting him off before he could start making excuses like he always did. "Is is what it takes for you to believe me?"
Jimin's Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed hard. "I'm sorry," he whispered weakly.
Sorry?
He was sorry?
"Is that all you have to say?" You forced the words, trembling with anger, out of your mouth. Keeping your eyes locked on him as you spoke, you poured out your feelings. "I've been by your side since we were in diapers, Park Jimin. I've stayed with you, supported you, did everything I could to make you happy for years. You got attacked and grew ears and a tail and I protected you. Even when you started dating a girl that I hated, I tried to support you, and what? When she called, you ran to her. Fine. When we kissed for the first time and then you announced that you two were 'official'? Fine.  When I confessed how much I loved you and you just-" 
You cut yourself off, moving on to a less painful subject before you lost it.
"Fine. I can deal with all of that. But when she's standing in front of us, holding a gun to your chest and obviously crazy, and I say "get away from her", how do you respond?" You pressed your shaking lips together and choked back tears, suddenly emotional. "'Shut up, Y/N'. Like I was in your way. Like I was the crazy one."
He was pale, fingers clasped together in front of him. He was clenching his hands so hard that the knuckles had gone sickly white. It was his eyes that got you. They were that neon yellow, burning with sadness and regret. Why couldn't he put to word all of the emotions that were roiling in there? I regret it, I was wrong, I love you. Any of those things would work.
Instead, he opened his mouth and said, "I'm sorry..."
The feeling you had at that moment was indescribable pain. There was some sadness mixed in too, but it mostly just hurt. He wouldn't even ask to forgiveness.
You wondered if he even regretted it.
Looking the boy that you loved dead in the eye, you shook your head.
"This time it's not okay."

[A/N]
☹️
Unedited.
Sorry it took so long.
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Thanks for the read.
PB

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