12: No Trust

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The next day the instant I got onto school property everyone wanted to know what happened. I mean wouldn't you? My face was all swollen now not just bruised.

'Oh what happened to your face!'
'You okay?'
'Damn Jamal must have gotten a hand of you again!'

I heard it all this morning, I didn't really respond to anyone until my friends asked me again. Mark asked me stupidly, "Wow why does your face look worse than it did last night? It's all swollen and bruised now."

"You stupid Mark!" Laughed Khalan.

"Listen, I messed up and got f---ed up. That's all." I said finally after hearing all of their dumb questions. I was tired of hearing the same thing from people, not that I didn't want to respond but it just reminded me of what actually happened.

"Hey who wants to come over to my house tonight" Jordan said after the questions about my face wore off. "My parents are out of town, it ain't ganna be a party. Just a lil smoke sesh. Ray looks like he needs some." Laughed Jordan teasing me.

Mark, Khalan, Shawn, Nathan and I all agreed to go to Jordan's 'lil' kick back. I was actually kind of excited, my life not living at 'home' was going pretty good. I got my girl back, I get to live with my best friend now and I'm going to have an awesome night with my friends.

I still kind of miss them, my family I mean. I don't miss how they acted towards me. But I think even if your parents hurt you, you'll still love them. They're a part of you, unless you completely 100% hate yourself you can't hate your parents. It may seem you do but you don't. You can't.

My dad used to hit me all the time but he's never done anything this intense. My mom is just simply annoying but my sister on the other hand. She's evil. Evil Emily is what I call her. I've never gotten along with her like I said before. We would always fight over petty things when we were young. Since we've gotten older the fights have grown from petty stuff to full on war between us.

I have dozens of crazy stories but I don't really want to think about them. She has her own idea of how I'm the evil one, but you can pick your side. I'm not going to try to convince you that I'm right, but I am.

"Jesus!" Exclaimed Jess, breaking my train of thought of my sister. "Baby, oh what happened!"

"I just got in some beef with a guy."

"Some beef!" Jess said grabbing my face and turning it examining the cuts and bruises.

"Damn it Jess." I flinched pulling away, "it's still sore..."

"Sorry babe, but who did this to you?"

"You don't know him." I lied, "I didn't even know him." This time telling the truth. I feel like I don't even know my dad anymore. I don't even know who I am.

"Some street sh-t, huh?" Asked Jess, not believing my story.

"That's right, Jess." I replied tying to convince her. She wasn't really believing my story, and I didn't blame her for not.

Eventually Jess decided to drop it, she knew she wouldn't get anything out of me.

"Well, we should do something after school then." Jess finally said grabbing my arm in excitement.

"I want to, but tonight I'm going to Jordan's house with the boys." I replied starting to head to class. I wasn't really thinking though, I might loose Jess again. I mean she doesn't really even trust me fully yet and I should probably give her attention, especially since I just got her back. But than again I wanted to hang with the boys.

"Ugh!" Grumbled Jess chasing after me, "Seriously bruh? You can't even give me a few hours between after school and tonight? You're ridiculous, maybe I shouldn't have given you another chance if you don't even want to be with me."

"What the hell, Jessica?!" I yelled stopping in my tracks, "Of course I want to be with you, and fine let's do something. I'm sorry I wasn't thinking."

"That's what I thought.." Jess snapped back and quickly walking away towards her class.

Maybe this wasn't worth it, I really loved being around Jess but since she doesn't trust me anymore she's been such a bitch. I just want to sleep with her and her not talk. Is that selfish? Probably but the way she's acting is stupid.

I finally got to my class and slumped down in my seat, this was the only class that me and Nathan didn't have together, it was also the class I hated most. English...

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