What Lies Beyond || AOT Boys x Reader

Chapter 12: Stars

Sitting on the roof of the Survey Corps headquarters you inhaled the crisp air. It was a few hours until the sun rose, the bright stars still prominent against the inky canvass.

It had been awhile since you've stayed up this late. Back outside the walls you would always spend time gazing into the black abyss that was littered with white specks. This kind of darkness never bothered you though, this darkness comforted you.

Lark had always invited you to sit with him during sleepless nights and taught you the names of each and every constellation he knew of. Sometimes you'd both make your own name for one of the clusters if Lark had forgotten its actual name or just didn't know what it was called.

Your eyes sought out the tail of the Little Dipper and jumped to the middle between Cassiopeia and Polaris. Lark had pointed it out one night after the deaths of your friends. The friends that Anthony had murdered.

Lark couldn't see the stars very well anymore, but he pointed it out with accuracy and smiled.

"You see that, Little Kestrel?" He said. "That place is where all of our souls go after we die. And when all of your friends leave you, they'll wait for you and you'll be with them again."

"That sounds stupid."

"It may be, Little Kestrel, but it gives me hope."

"Why?"

"Because when I feel alone I can look up into the sky and remember Im not. Im not alone because all of the people I care about who left this world are up there waiting for me, and I remember that even if it seems like it's the end for me, I need to keep fighting. For them."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you will be alone in life sometimes and it's good to have something to believe in once in awhile."

You sighed and squinted harder at the spot that was devoid of light and wondered if Lark was there, watching over you. You hoped so. You hopped he was happy there, safe from all of the horrors and sadness of the world you lived in.

Sometimes you thought if it was better to just die and end the pain and suffering, but Thomas needed you and if that place Lark had talked about really did exist, you'd get an angry earful from him about how stupid you are.

You snorted and rested your chin against the divot of your knee and started to hum the familiar tunes that Lark had always sung. It didn't sound as sweet on your tongue like Lark, but it filled a small piece of your torn heart.

Lark had never sang the words that went along with the tune, but it didn't matter. It still held significance to you.

You shifted and felt a few of your joints crack from your lack of movement, reminding you of how long you've been sitting on the cold rooftop. It wasn't like anyone would notice if you were gone anyways, you were like a shadow.

Groaning from your stiff limbs, you stood and stretched.

You could probably use a few hours of sleep anyways. Erwin had finally assigned you to train along with Thomas's squadron after your bruises and dislocated arm had healed a little over three weeks ago and the constant whining that came from inactivity and boredom.

It was difficult working with a group when you were used to working solo for the majority of your life, which caused a few problems here and there. Your rugged personality didn't help much either and made you unapproachable.

You tried your best to try and connect with others, but it was pretty much impossible. You came from a world of backstabbers and killers, not one that handed out trust on a silver platter.