Focus

Chapter 26: Questions

"Did we have sex?" I asked flatly. My eyes drilled holes into his and he let out a breath of hot air.

"Harry... can you give us some time alone?" Louis asked quietly. Harry nodded and escaped to the front porch.

It was quiet as the front door clicked slowly shut. The silence seemed louder than anything I had ever heard in my life... and I didn't like it.

Louis still didn't answer my question.

"Louis," I breathed. "Like Harry said, you have to tell me."

His head dropped to his hands and he let out a stress filled sigh. "Can we play a game before I tell you?"

I was taken aback. "Um... sure?"

He lifted his head, suppressing a smirk. "What's your favorite color?"

"Silver."

"Favorite animal?"

"Leopard,"

"Favorite quote,"

"You are a daisy like no other, darling."

"Tea or coffee?"

"Coffee,"

"Siblings?"

"A brother and a sister,"

"Height?"

"5'7," I held up my hand stopping the next question. "Louis what is this even accomplishing? Just tell me what I asked."

"One more question," he announced.

"Louis,"

"Please." Our eyes met for the first true time that day, and his eyes were a clear cerulean that could never hurt me...

"One question."

He inhaled deeply and asked in a loud rush, "HOWMANYKIDSDOYOUWANT?"

"Whoa, whoa, slow down." I said slowly.

"How many kids to you want?" he asked slowly after a brief pause.

"I don't know, why?" I asked, flustered. I never really dwelled on the thought of having kids running around me, pulling on my hair, demanding to play a game, or spilling things every few seconds.

"Because, you might have them." he said quietly, just above a whisper.

"What?" I asked, my mouth hanging open.

He let out a breath, "You might be pregnant.... with my child."

"We had sex?" I asked timidly, almost like a toddler.

He nodded his head slowly, like if he were to nod too fast it would fly off.

"AND YOU WEREN'T GOING TO TELL ME?!" I screamed.

He cringed down farther into his seat on the couch.

"Oh my God," I whispered to myself. "I'm 23, I can't have a baby... I'm not done with living my life.... I can barely take care of myself, how am I going to take care of a child?"

I dropped my head to my hands, and suddenly my whole experience with Louis flashed in front of my eyes; the toy store looking for a damn keyboard, the grocery store, the day Uncle and I spend looking for him, the bookstore where I met Harry and he called him, the yogurt place where we ate frozen yogurt and he promised me another date, the friendzone, when he ran to the hospital to make sure Uncle and I were okay, the night he stayed over for the first time, the kiss, my first sip of wine, the time he played "She Will Be Loved," the time we went back to the bookstore and I was almost kidnapped by his bandmate, when we went to Nandos, when he stayed the night again and we almost had sex the night that Uncle died, when we got drunk together and had sex....

Harry popped back into the room. "I heard yelling... so she knows?" he asked carefully.

"Oh my God," I repeated under my breath.

"She knows," he answered himself. He clicked his tongue and walked over to me like a big brother. "Andy," he cooed as he sat down next me on the other side. "Louis.... he's an idiot... but I know that he would be a good father. So, if you are... preggers, and if you have to be stuck with this guy, at least he's a good one."

I looked back up to look over at Louis, who was twiddling his thumbs like a kid who just got in trouble. "Is there still a chance that we used a condom or something?" I paused. "We were going to the first time."

"First time?" Harry said, taken by surprise.

"Story for another time, Harold." Louis said sternly. He looked up at the ceiling. "There's always the possibility."

"We have to check. Now." I blurted.

"Check?" Harry asked.

"We need to go to the store and get a pregnancy test, or go to a doctor or something... We need to find out if there's a baby growing inside me." I announced, my voice clearly shaky.

Louis nodded.

"I'll drive Harry back to the bar so he can drive home himself and I'll meet you at the store?" Louis offered.

I nodded.

Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, and taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.

And son, I had no clue of what the hell was happening next.