Order of Magnitude

XXII. One Phone Call

      Dr. Moon and Dr. Soleil finished filling out their reports. They had not been able to confirm the death of BTOF-Delta, but were confident that he died with his nest. Moon was naturally upset about the loss of such a valuable specimen, but the two were ready to resume their experiments. All they had to do was wait until they had a good stock of parvs to inject. After all, the BTOF formula was finally starting to bear fruit, and they were both eager to continue their work on it.

      The two scientists ate their pizza in silence, pouring over facts and figures. They looked up every now and then to point out a particularly interesting derivation or humorous equation, but otherwise remained quiet. The sudden sound of the phone ringing caught their attention with a couple of audible yelps.

      "You think they found BTOF-Delta?" Dr. Moon asked worriedly, shooting a quick glance at the telephone.

      "No, he's dead," Soleil answered. "Probably just Dr. Reno asking about our progress this week."

      Moon let the phone ring a few more times before swallowing a lump in his throat and lifting the receiver to his ear. "Hello?" he answered in a small voice.

      "Good evening," a pleasant voice said from the other end. "Please stand by for the office of the Prime Minister."

      Dr. Moon was taken aback. "Um... okay..."

      "Who is it?" Soleil asked.

      "The Prime Minister."

      "What?"

      "Good evening, Dr. Moon," a rough voice began on the other side of the line. "This is Francis Bean; I am calling on the behalf of Prime Minister Antony."

      "Yes, sir," the scientist replied, not sure if he should stand or remain seated. How would they know either way? In the end, he opted to stand.

      "I'm sure I don't have to tell you about the big news story today," Bean said. "About what happened at the Burger World around the corner from you?"

      "No, sir. We've had media vans driving around all afternoon."

      "We here in the office of the Prime Minister don't think it's too big of a deal. Who cares if some fat lady found a parv in her French fries? It happens. And the reports of food poisoning... there is no evidence at all to suggest that there is any foul play involved."

      "I don't know all the details, sir. But they found tiny footprints around the restaurant. A lot of people think that a group of parvs were involved."

      "I know what the people think!" Bean bellowed. "It's ludicrous. Parvs would never intentionally harm a human. Why would they? We are firmly in charge here. Not to mention that the whole idea undercuts the Prime Minister's main initiative. He wants people to treat parvs more humanely, and he can't sell that message if they are rising up to poison us. Do you understand what I'm telling you?"

      "Yes, sir," Moon said reluctantly.

      "Now, here is the thing. I've already been in contact with Dr. Reno, and he referred me to you. Said you were close to a breakthrough formula on safely reducing our pest problem..."

      The scientist's mind raced. What could he say? One of their test cases escaped in a daring rescue and now may or may not be dead? No, he had to lie. "We believe we are very close, sir."

      "Good... good." Moon hoped that would be the end of it, but Bean went on. "We expect to have a full report about it from you at the Burger World on Friday."

      "What? What are you talking about?"

      "Prime Minister Antony is going to be holding a press conference there. He wants to show the nation that there is nothing to fear. You know how it is, grab some fries to prove that everything's fine, say a few words to advance his agenda, and everybody loosens up. It's just a PR stunt, but it would sure help things if you were there to explain the results of your experiments."

      Dr. Moon was still in shock. "The Prime Minister is coming here?"

      "He feels it's the best. After all, this Burger World incident didn't take place that far from us. People think that if it happens in his neck of the woods, it can happen anywhere. So, yeah, he's going to take a nice trip to the suburbs and put the people at ease."

      "I understand."

      "And Dr. Moon, one more thing," Bean said to the frightened scientist. "A lot of the Prime Minister's agenda is relying on this. So, you better have some good news to report to the world. And if you don't, we'll have to compel Dr. Reno to find someone who does!"

      The line went dead with a crisp slam.