I led aysha out of the school and she reluctantly followed me through the parking lot. it seemed to get colder and colder out as the days progressed. i looked over my shoulder to ensure that she was still right behind me. she looked paranoid, confused and angry all at once. I turned my attention to my thoughts.
i regretted trusting people. there was never a time where I wasn't betrayed. I was beginning to feel like everyone around me wasn't really there. was this life I held nothing more than some sort of simulation I made for myself to make me feel normal? maybe I really was insane as they said, maybe I didn't love anyone, maybe I was too far ahead of myself once again. I watched my shadow following me on the ground. I wanted to tell it to go away but I didn't want to seem like a complete psychopath in front of aysha. she was already fearful enough. I thought about the time I-
"are you going to tell me anything?" aysha asked, cutting off my thoughts and catching up to my side. I shook off my previous introspection. "grant," she nudged my side looking for a response. "what's wrong with you?"
i kept my head in the direction I was walking, ignoring her questions. we came up on my car and I stopped.
we stood in the back of the lot in silence for a moment. here, it was safe and far from the other cars. "why did you bring us all the way out here? if I'm late to my next class my mom will-"
"shut the fuck up, Jesus christ," I sighed and opened up the door of the backseat on the left side and gestured for her to take a look.
she leaned her head closer to the car, "uh... you dragged me all this way to show me some coffee stains?" she raised an eyebrow and shot me a concerned look. "what is this shit?"
"it's not coffee." i leaned against the door, holding it open. "take a closer look."
"is it... blood?" she laughed nervously.
i stared at her blankly.
"please don't tell me its blood." her voice shook, and she stepped away from the door. "is this why you've been acting crazy for the past week? ignoring your friends, skipping classes, posting those creepy indirects on Instagram, talking to yourself? shall i keep going? because the list goes on-"
i quickly closed the door and locked the vehicle, tucking the keys into my pocket. "it might be blood. I wasn't sure if it was real."
"you weren't sure if it was real?" her eyes grew wide. "grant seriously, what the hell is up with you? do I need to call someone? why is there blood in your car?" she kept up with the questions, stepping toward the vehcile and gazing through the window at the blood. I tensed up.
"do you really want to find out?" i began walking back towards the school, waving for aysha to follow.
"well yeah, now you have to tell me." I notcied she kept a small distance away from me as we walked side by side.
"it's a pretty long story. but long story short, I had a bit of a misunderstanding with... someone." I chewed on my lip and glanced from ayshas countenance to the ground. I was worried about what her reaction would be if I told her the truth. would she tell anyone? would she be afraid of me?
"what kind of 'misunderstanding'?"
***
Ian and nelly conversed in the front of the car about whatever happened to be on their minds. I leaned my head against the window behind the passenger seat and watched the trees fly past the vehicle. we were going well over the speed limit but I didn't mind. I liked the feeling of being in a car, whether or not i was the driver. I just wanted to listen to music and stare out the window in all honesty. sounds kind of cheesy or whatever but it was probably my favorite hobby.
fortunately for me, I began to notice raindrops on the window slide slowly to right while others joined them. rain, music, and car ride? could it get any better?
i sat up and turned my attention to the other window, scoping out an open swamp on the other side of the country ridden road. swamps made my skin crawl. was I the only one who found them unsettling?
i pulled my earbuds from my ears as Ian suddenly began to slow down, and haulted to a stop. alarmed, I found myself between the driver and passenger seat.
a small fawn stood still in front of our car, like a stand off. my vision flickered and the fawn was gone.
"why did we stop?" nelly asked ian.
"I thought i saw a baby deer," Ian narrowed his eyes and looked from left to right on the road.
"yeah, so did i..." I agreed.
"I didn't see anything." nelly shrugged.
Ian slowly turned his gaze to me.
It clicked.
