Us Against The World ｡ Peter Parker [2]

29 - Dark Days

I had been through heartbreak once before and it had created a hole in my heart; something so dark that it would drag me to my lowest point each year at the very exact time. The loss of my brother stirred clouded thoughts in my head every October and that guilt and depression and howling pain would claw at my mind and soul for a month. Heartbreak came in waves though. One minute the world was full of endless light then within a second, that darkness was like a heavy cloud and you were drenched in sorrow again. I was very familiar with loss, but this kind was different. This kind of heartache was a consistent reminder because instead of reliving old memories, I saw him every single day and that hot flash of anger and sadness and pain would whisper in my ear and tell me everything that I had lost was just within reach.

"Macbeth, huh?" A new voice startled me, the thin book that had been resting in my hands slipping towards the carpeted flooring of Midtown's theatre. Liz Allan quickly reached down to hand me my assigned reading for class with a friendly smile. "I remember the torture that is William Shakespeare. Mrs. Carter's class, yeah?"

I gave a brief nod, "Um, yeah."

Liz Allan combed some of her thick silky hair behind her ear and without question, dropped into the seat next to me. On stage a few student actors that had been casted in Spring Awakening were running through lines, Mary Jane among them. The theatre was almost empty because of lunch but sitting lonely in the plush seats of the play rehearsal was far better than moping at my usual lunch table with my friends and trying my best not to melt down with Peter Parker's sad eyes. "Mr. Harrington mentioned you're coming on our trip downstate for the National Academic Decathlon this weekend. I just wanted to thank you, we really needed an extra person to make sure everything runs smoothly."

"I didn't really get a choice in the matter." I mumbled quietly.

She tilted her head, "I know that too. But it should be a really great trip away from everything in the city. I'm sure it will get your mind off Peter--" her voice dropped off, realising her mistake. Quickly she was offering a sad smile in return and that very notion twisted my stomach. All week my friends, mere students in my classes and even a teacher had given me that same sad smile. The one filled with pity for the girl that had gotten dumped. Apparently, the gossip had trailed through school like wildfire.

"I doubt it," I sourly noted. "But thanks, Liz."

Honestly, I didn't know Liz Allan, which was only natural since she was older and we didn't share classes but she was sweet and put a lot of effort into her studies and the school. She was planning the entire Homecoming dance and everything, which could not have left much time for socialising. Apparently, she was a girl carved from my own heart and maybe it wasn't such a crazy idea in being friends.

Suddenly, a crash sounded from the stage and a string of mumbled curses rang out through the theatre. Liz was hurrying to her feet, offering a wave of her fingertips before she investigated the damage of the set. That's when my bubbly best friend took the chance to check on me. "Hey..." Her greeting was drawn out and already, her hovering was getting under my skin.

"I'm fine, okay?"

Mary Jane's face dropped and naturally, I felt terrible for snapping at her when she was only trying to be helpful and so caring about my recent dumping. The last few days had been different. I had grown so used to having Peter Parker around; to meet him at my locker after school, to hold hands on our journey towards the subway, to simply tell him about my day. It wasn't only the Spidey stuff that I missed, it was the mundane things that left a terrible pain in my chest. But despite all that change, I wasn't about to let that shatter everything. I was putting on a brave face. I was moving on. I was doing my best in creating a false sense that I was truely alright with everything.