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it is better to be feared than loved
March Hare [noun] loud, insane, silly
Avoidant Personality Disorder [noun] hypersensitive to rejection and are unwilling to become involved with others unless they are sure of being liked
. . .
Namjoon took two glasses of wine and sat on the bed. He watched as the man before him fixed on the DVD player.
"How'd you like to spend the night? Notting Hill or Pretty Woman?"
"I'd prefer you." He gave the space beside him a good pat. The man put on Pretty Woman and played the movie.
"Stop teasing me, Namjoon." He crawled into space beside his lover and took the other glass of wine.
The lights were out, and the only thing that covered their loud thoughts was the conversation of the actors. Darkness drowned them under the uncertainty of love, and acceptance. There was the ache in knowing they could never declare their feelings, afraid that judgment would get under their skin and will eventually drive them mad.
How could love be so wrong, if it's the only feeling that keeps you alive?
Namjoon repositioned himself so that he could rest his head on his lover's chest. He cleaved on him like it was their last night on earth.
"How long do we have to hide this?"
"Until I could love myself." Jin finished off his wine and gazed upon the window.
Until I could love myself, I would have to hide what I am, what we are.
"Isn't it enough that I love you?" Namjoon looked up at him, only to find him staring at the ocean of stars.
"How do you know that love will always be enough?" He closed his eyes and a tear escaped his eye. Jin doesn't have to scream to let the world know how much his heart was breaking.
I've given you all the love I could give, I'm afraid I left nothing for myself.
—
a/n: don't forget to press the little twinkle below ❤️
