From hate, to Lust to Love

13 Scared for life

Yes. I agree to be his maid. I was shocked when I saw him. I thought I was asked to come for another round of torture. But he is showing me little mercy and kindness. Bless him.

I am not the same woman I used to be. I have become very scared of any for of touching. I am extremely fearful of facing people. I don't laugh. I don't browse the net fear of my pics circulating. I have become the ideal living dead.

Sometimes I think I cant feel either. I feel numb a lot of times. When someone insult me, I go in to this shell where even I cant find myself. So, for the sake of my family, I will do this. He promised he wont abuse me, and I will do all what it takes as long as he needs to work for him.

"I will come tomorrow" I told him.

"Do you want to know how much you will be paid?" he asked me. I didn't think he would pay me. So, I looked at him in surprise.

"Are you willing to pay me?" something like an anger crossed his eyes, but I have to know. I wasn't expecting.

"Yes. I am. My driver will come with you to collect your belongings. Except for clothes, don't bring anything else" he ordered me.

I can only nod. I haven't had any food since lunch yesterday. I feel very weak.

"I will go now. Thanks sir" he needs to be respected. He is my filthy rich employer.

"What sir? Why are you calling me sir?" he almost shouted at me. For some reason ever since we started this discussion, I am making him angry one way or the other.

"You are my employer. You deserve that respect. I will go and bring myself, if you'd excuse me now"

"It's lunch time. My staff is taking lunch. You will eat with me before my driver picks you up. Don't argue as you will be eating here from now on. Follow me"

And I did as I  was asked. I was thinking had it been the old Amira, she would have been very excited to see all these beauty. But my I feel cold, inside and out.

I sat on a table with a lavish lunch. It looks very nice. I cant remember when it was I had a stomach full. I always eat minimum as I need to pay bills and expecting a rainy day anytime.

I just took few pieces. My stomach is conditioned to that. I cant take large portions just because it is presented.

"Eat" Robert ordered.  

"Thanks. This is enough" I told him. He eyed me with some raw emotions. I am sure I am making him angry. So I went to explain him "I eat little as I have to pay the bills. My body is used to it. At once I cant take large portions. But I am sure with time I will. Thanks"

After that he silently ate with his head down. I sat and waited till next order.

"I will drive you as I have some work on the way. You will collect your things and meet me in 15mins"

"okay"

He drove me to my room. I kept quite all the way. I repeatedly ask myself, why am not angry? why am I not shouting at him? Why am I not feeling anything? And the answer was I am "scared" and I am "scared for life"

**********************

She packed her stuff in a small bag. Things will be different for her from now on. I remember the vibrant young woman with golden eyes sparkle like diamonds. And just as I was taking off the car, my phone rang.

It's Helen. Ofcouse. She hardly leaves me alone these days. I was certainly not in a mood to entertain her since I got to know about Amira. I don't need that kind distraction for the time being.

"For the million time, I will call you when I am ready or if I am ready. What in Gods name is it difficult for you to understand that?" I shouted at her.

"oh, I didn't mean to disturb. I understand darling. You are busy. May be we can catch up this weekend. I have missed you so much"

I could see Amira's discomfort when I yell. "Helen, just leave me alone" I told her in calmly. I pray she doesn't take that tone for tenderness.

Then I drove her back home. She was confused as I told her I had to go somewhere too. But she held herself from asking.

Mrs. Harry or June is the housekeeper at my house and the only one stays in the house except for a maid for cleaning. Mrs. Harry is a elderly colored woman in her late 50s. She is a sweet woman and a motherly figure at home.

I called June soon after I bought Amira home. I explained her everything. And from June's expression I can say she think me for the brute I am. I agree. I am that brute.

"So June. Help me. Help me to bring her back. Help her to eat and get enough rest. It kills me to see what I have done for her" I told her sadly.

"Okay. You leave her to my care. I'll arrange the guest room for her" she said kindly.

When we went down to meet Amira, she was looking at a plant. I remember how she had her apartment filled with plants. The look on her face was heart breaking enough.

"Amira, this is June. She is the house keeper. She will help you to settle in. Your help is not required for another week. You can rest until then"

she looked at me in a strange way but kept quite. And I added "I need you to have meals with me when I am home. Is that clear?"

"Why?"

"Because this is my house and I am damn well control of it. If I say you eat with me, you eat with me. If I say eat more, you eat more. Do I make myself clear?" I asked her pretending to be angry but breaking inwardly.