Oblivion

Chapter 8-violence

This kind of sucks . I got a bit of writers block in the beginning but I think I managed. its kind of long but ... oh well . enjoy I guess .

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Its been about a week since everything has happened .

Zany at the park

The hospital

My teacher

My dad

After I got out of the hospital everything sort of went back to normal .. well not normal but ya know . nothing has really happened at school surprisingly . just shoves and punches occasionally . its kind of weird but I'm not getting my hopes up . I've been avoiding zany on purpose . I don't want him to think were friends or anything . though he does try talking to me at times and I just ignore him or walk away . oh god that sounds so horrible but I mean .. it doesn't matter .

Also at school my teacher didn't ask anymore . I was always nervous around her now though . I know she knows I'm lying but I don't care . plus its not like she cares so she can just stop . I try to ignore her too but its kind of hard when she's my teacher . anyway she's hasn't given me any crap about the whole 'cutting thing' and thank god she hasn't said anything either .

At home though .. that's a different story . ever since that night he started getting more violent . he's started drinking more often . I don't know what or why . its been getting worse and worse it seems . not only does he still come in my room but after he hits me .

He hits me and the things he says .. he calls me name and tells me how nobody will ever love me . tell me that i-I'm a waste of space and that nobody would miss me if I were gone . when I try to scream or cry he just hits me harder or puts his filthy hands over my mouth .

I feel so disgusting and just ugh I just want to rip all my skin off . I feel so dirty I feel as though I'm some cheap prostitute .

its Saturday so were all currently sitting in the living room and by 'all' I mean me, J, and mom . mom said we should wait for dad to come home so we could eat dinner but its currently 10 pm and he's still not home . I doubt he's coming but she's so hung up on going . I don't even want to be here J dragged me over here . she's been more caring I mean she's still oblivious but we have our moments . they were watching TV while I was seated on the floor leaning against j's legs . it was actually quite peaceful . that is until the door swung open .

in came my father . you could already tell her was drunk by the disgusting smell his body gave off . he smelled like sweat and alcohol . not a very good combination . my moms head snapped towards the living room doorway as he made his way inside . I scrunched my nose up in disgust at the smell . j seemed to be thinking the same because she got coughed a little before casually putting her hand over her nose .

"oh my god have you been drinking ?!" my mother practically yells . I close my eyes shaking my head at her . she shouldn't do that . its only going to make him mad .

"I do what I want im the man in this house" he snarled . oh god we need to leave .

I turn to j and touch he hand to get her attention . "we should probably go" I say as quietly as possible so he wouldn't hear and get mad . mom was still yelling at him and he was getting madder and madder . j nodded before we slowly got up heading to my room .

Although j was older she was still kind of like my baby sister . I closed the door locking it before we both sat down on my bed our backs leaning against the wall . she pulled her knees up to her chest flinching slightly when the yelling got more intense .

I scooted closer putting an arm around her shoulder whispering "hey its gonna be ok". She just nodded before leaning into the embrace . she sniffled a little and I tightened my grip around her . it was nothing new that they were arguing . this happened all the time but this time the yelling seemed more violent .

When the yelling finally stopped I checked and saw it was 11:37 pm . wow . I looked and saw that j had fallen asleep her cheeks tear stained . I laid her down on my bed before tucking her in . I slowly and silently went out of my room down to the living room . my dad was sitting on the couch and my mom was no where in sight . she probably went to bed ,I thought .

I turned but stopped when I heard him get up from the couch striding over to where I was . I tried to run to my room but he caught me pushing me into the wall . I yelped at the sudden pain in my left side .

"this is all your fucking fault" he slurred . he always says that . I don't even know what I did wrong . he grabs my shoulders roughly pushing me into the wall again . my back aching all over already . I squeeze my eyes shut while he vigorously shakes my shoulders and repeats that its all my fault .

"this is all your fucking fault" he practically yells . I open my eyes only to be met with his fist . I scream at the pain . he knees me in my stomach making me double over and cry clutching my stomach . I cant take this . im gonna do it . im gonna call for help this time .

"MOM!" I yell at the top of my lungs still sobbing hard . probably not the best idea but I feel like im about to collapse . he immediately punches me several time until I fall to the ground . my throat burns from screaming for my mom or j to come save me but nobody's coming . why isn't anyone saving me ? he kicks me about 3 times before hes pushed off . I continue crying but sigh a bit in relief .

"what the hell ?!" j screams pushing him further until he hits the wall . damn I never knew she was that strong . her face is red from anger and tears stream down her face . she pushes him roughly one more time before rushing over to where im still on the ground .

"MOM get the fuck down here" she yells out to my mom . immediately the sound of running comes from the hall and mom appears in her robe and her slippers . her hair messily in a pony tail while she puts her hand over her mouth looking as if shes about to cry . did she seriously not hear any of this ?

"GET THE FUCK OUT NOW" she yells at him while pushing him out of the door . she throws his shoes out and slams the door shut running over to where j is sitting with me on the floor .

"oh liam my baby" she says gently taking my face in her hands looking at my bruised face .

"what did you do to make him so angry liam ?" she says quietly . what the fuck . I quickly move away from her looking at her as if she was crazy . j doing the same only looking as if shes about to cry even more .

"what the fuck is wrong with you mom ?! liam didn't do anything are you insane !" j yells coming over to me and pulling me in a tight embrace . I cant believe this .

"w-what I mean h-he obviously did something to your f-fath-" she started but was cut off by j screaming at her .

"NO WHAT THE HELL HE SHOULDN'T EVEN BE CALLED OUR FATHER ! hes nothing but a pathetic drunk who comes home only to yell and hit liam " she seethes through clenched teeth . and then something happened that I never ever wanted to see .

She hit j

She actually slapped j . my sister . the only one who has ever made an attempt to make me feel happy or needed .

J holds her cheek in her hand while mom looks as if shes about to say something but I react quicker and pull j up with me . even though im in so much pain I manage to get us to my room quickly . shutting the door and locking it .

I sit on the bed with j while we both sit there and cry . what the hell has happened . I never wanted anything to happen to j . this is all my fault . none of this would've happened if it weren't for me calling for help . I should've just taken it like always .

This is all my fault

All my fault