Reunited [A Bensler Fan Fic] Book Two

~10~

Olivia's POV

I drove the kids to school the next morning with their bags of clothes ready to be dropped off with Elliot. They were going to stay with him for a bit longer than usual, because I couldn't deal with them right now. I needed to work for a few days before I'd be comfortable enough to have them back home. Hopefully spending time with their father will make them change their minds and allow them to stop acting like brats.

"Mama, can you walk me to my class?" Cayden asked, as I put the car in park and waited for the kids to spill out.

"Cayd, I have to get to work." I breathed, and he frowned.

"But Mama!" He cried, and I knew this was going to be a giant fit.

"Okay!" I exclaimed, before climbing out of the vehicle.

I got him out of his car seat, and placed him on my hip before grabbing his bag. The other kids didn't say a thing as they walked towards their schools. I sighed as I carried my son into the school, after attempting to avoid his fit.

"Mama, I love you." He spoke sweetly, as we walked towards his preschool class.

"Cayden." I sighed, and he grabbed my necklace in his little hand and played with it as he spoke.

"I love you, and I sorry." 

"Cayd-" I started, but my son was being stubborn like his father.

"I didn't mean to make your cry, Mama."

I frowned, but I turned my head towards him and kissed his forehead gently.

"I love you too, Cayd."

---

I dropped by Elliot's work after I dropped the kids off at school, and just being near him was making me want to cry. He is the love of my life, my soulmate, but since we are parents, and love our children more than we love ourselves, we gave each other up, again.

"Leo." I breathed, as I walked into the office, and Elliot's business partner looked up at me.

"Hey, Olivia. What's up?" He asked, and I frowned.

"Would you mind giving these to Elliot? They are the kids' stuff." I spoke, and Leo nodded slowly.

"Of course." He spoke, and I bit my lip.

"Is he okay?" I asked, my voice weak.

"Olivia, he's heartbroken." He replied, and I quickly wiped a tear from my cheek.

"I-" I started, as Elliot walked out of his office.

"Liv." He breathed, and I swallowed hard as I looked at him.

"Hi." I whispered.

He looked at Leo, before looking back at me.

"Liv, mind coming into my office?" He asked, and I nodded slowly.

I followed Elliot into his office. Then he shut the door, and pushed me towards the wall, where he slammed his lips into mine in a passionate kiss.

I moaned into his lips, as my mind screamed at me, telling me that I shouldn't be kissing him back. But he's my Elliot. He's the love of my life, and not being able to be with him sucks.

"I've missed you so much." Elliot breathed, as he placed his forehead against mine.

"I've missed you too." I whimpered, as I started to cry.

He pulled me to his chest and held me as I cried, then he started to cry too. We were one big mess.

"We can be together. We can be quiet about it. I'll keep dating you." Elliot spoke, as he leaned down and kissed my lips softly.

"What about the kids?!" I cried.

"I don't care if they hate us. You know that they will get over this with time. I just want to be with you, Olivia. I just want to hold you in my arms once again, and feel like you are really mine."

---

I left Elliot with a heavy heart. I didn't turn him down, nor did I agree. I wanted to tell him yes from the moment he asked, but then again I don't want to hurt my kids again. Even if they hurt their father and myself, I don't want them to live a life that was like mine or Elliot's. They didn't need the pain.

"Hey, Liv!" Amanda exclaimed, as I walked into the squad room. I nodded slightly at her, before walking towards my office. I shut the door, before walking over to my desk and sitting down. I grabbed a clip from one of the drawers, and I clipped my hair back before pulling my laptop out and starting to go through emails. Amanda came in a few moments after, and she frowned.

"You're eyes are red and bloodshot, and I can see where the teardrops have fallen on your shirt. Now, tell me why you were crying." Amanda spoke, and I shook my head.

"Rollins, please leave me alone." I replied, my voice sounding as cold as when I have been yelling at my kids.

"Liv, I'm not doing this. You may be my Commanding Officer, but I will not leave you in here upset. Now, what is happening, since you come in crying most days then not."

"Amanda!" I cried, and she frowned.

"Olivia."

"Okay, I'm upset. You know that, and everyone else clearly knows that. But my personal life doesn't matter, because I barely have one. Now, go back and work!" I spat, and then there were the tears again.

I hung my head, and let the tears fall onto my desk.

"Liv." Amanda breathed, as she walked over towards me, but I shook my head. I stood up and wiped them from my cheeks as more and more fell, but I wasn't letting her comfort me. Never.

"I'm tired of having my kids run my life. Elliot and I broke up. My kids refused to come home because they HATE me. They hate me because I was happy. They hate Elliot because he was happy. That's why I've been crying. But I'm a big girl. I should be dealing with this fine. I shouldn't be upset."

"You're upset because it's not just some random guy." She breathed, and I shook my head.

"No."

"Liv-"

"NO!" I screamed. Amanda held her hands up, and backed from the room, before closing the door. 

I didn't want her to know how I felt. I didn't want anything right now unless it was a man with icy blue eyes, and a smile that warms my soul.

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