My drawings and artwork!

Visual Memoir: "Restrained Isolation Couldn't Break My Rose Colored Glasses"

I did this awhile ago for my English class where I had to create a written or visual memior, and I guess it's pretty obvious which I picked. 😂

For visual memiors you have to create an illustraton that depicts a 6-12 word sentence that describes your life story or a significant event that shaped your life.

I thought about it for awhile and I came up with "Restrained Isolation Couldn't Break My Rose Colored Glasses"

I chose this because growing up I wasn't really allowed to go out at all or make any friends for very serious and heavy reasons, and as a result I was constantly isolated and alone growing up and I was never allowed to speak to absolutely anyone about the situation.
I felt very much like Rapunzel because of how lonely it could be at times. But I won't go into explaining all that now, that would be a long chapter. 😂

----(If you're interested in what I meant just now you can check out the chapter I wrote about it in my "book of tags" that talks about my past and what I went through a little more in depth. it's the very first chapter in the book)----

But despite having a bit of a rough past I was never a negative kid, and no matter what happened I almost never had a bad outlook on anything, ever. I always believed that situations were temporary and anything could change.

But ironically, a few weeks after finishing this drawing I went through a period of very heavy and suffocating depression.
There was a lot going on where I felt more trapped than ever before and everything just kind of came crashing down on me. It would take a long time to explain all of what happened, But one of the big ones that really shook me was my mom almost committed suicide. And I wasn't okay for a long time after that, it seemed like there was always one thing after another and i never had any answers to anything which was part of why I went inactive on here for so long.

I really didn't feel like myself for awhile and I didn't end up handing this drawing in to my English teacher because somehow I felt like if I handed it in then the words I wrote in my visual memoir would be a lie, I felt like my "rose colored glasses" had been broken and I wasn't the same person as before. I actually ended up dropping out of "school" completely
Because I couldn't handle everything that was going on with my life at the time. 😅

To this day I still haven't shown my teacher but I have come to learn that my "glasses" didn't really break.
And I don't think I've really changed all that much now that I think about it, but my character has grown.
I was just going through an extremely rough time that did a lot of damage. It took awhile for me to pick myself back up and break through the depression but I'm doing so so much better now.

I do still have rough days where it's emotionally hard for me, but I'm really trying my best not to focus on the negative things and be thankful for even small things. Even making a list of things you're thankful can be really helpful when dealing with the irrational thoughts that depression brings. And trust me. Your mind doesn't think rationally and pits everything against you when struggling with it. Its not easy.

But really, taking a look at what's in your life to be thankful for, no matter how small can be really helpful. :D 

A really big healing experience for me was getting to go to Kcon LA last summer and experience SO many amazing things including meeting my favorite artists which is a memory I REALLY cherish deeply. <3 having to work hard earn enough money to go gave me something to focus on and work towards which kept my mind off of happenings that otherwise weighed on my mind.