Everything Has Changed

Chapter Fourteen: Sneaking Out

To the people confused about what Danny was talking about when he said he was jealous of the wind, if you didn't listen to the song, the first verse is:
"I'm jealous of the rain

That falls upon your skin

It's closer than my hands have been

I'm jealous of the rain

I'm jealous of the wind

That ripples through your clothes

It's closer than your shadow

Oh, I'm jealous of the wind"

So that's what he meant when he said he was jealous.

*****

Chapter Fourteen: Sneaking Out

I never thought it would happen. I knew my entire life that no matter what was thrown at Danny and I's friendship, we would get through it.

It started slowly, where he would give me short answers to make conversations short, and then we just stopped talking in person, and then we would text and not call or hang out, and then he stopped texting me, too, and he stopped answering me.

By Friday night, which is tonight, we don't talk at all.

And I'm lying in bed in the dark. My eyes are locked on the ceiling fan, and every time lightning flashes, it lights up my room.

My face is soaked with tears and no matter what I can do in my head to fix things, it all comes down to me.

He has been by my side for everything, and he was so happy before I knew.

Now he's miserable and I want to bash my head into a wall.

If I could just start having feelings for him, things could change, but I don't know how.

And what if I never do? Will I lose him all together?

I can't. I can't do this. I don't know how to fix this.

I sit up and yank my curtains aside, my eyes locking on treacherous downpour.

It's only eight at night but I've been in bed since I got out of school, just like I do every day now.

I hear knocking on my door.

"Yeah?" I call.

I hear my door creak.

"Are you sleeping?" Dad asks.

"No."

"Come out here."

"But-"

"Now." He says.

I wipe my tears and walk into my bathroom to splash cold water on my face.