I Hate That I Love You
Chapter 10
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Blake's POV
I looked down at the beautiful woman cuddled up to me and smiled. I hadn't gone back to sleep since she woke up from her nightmare and saw me sleeping on her floor.
Don't get me wrong, I am dead tired. But how could I sleep when Carly Price was so close to me? I didn't want to close my eyes. I was scared that this was all a dream and it'll disappear the moment I go to sleep. I wanted to stay awake and take this all in.
Her scent enveloped me. Carly always smelled like sweet flowers and I was the bee who was attracted to it. Her breath was brushing over my chest and I felt her heart beat a steady rhythm on my side.
I mentally beat myself up in remorse. How could I have possibly been so horrible to this woman? I treated her so wrong and was the reason she had witnessed what she did. She had every right to be angry at me. So why did she invite him in her bed? Carly West was a genuinely nice person but I didn't deserve her kindness.
I couldn't help but feel selfish at the fact that I treated her the way I did, wanting her to get lost, but the moment she turned around to give me the freedom I've always wanted from her, I wanted nothing more than to have her back at my side.
I was the asshole of all assholes. The jerks of all jerks. The biggest dick of them all. No pun intended.
My heart ache at the memory of all the disrespectful things I've said and done to her. My heart cracked from remembering how I treated her the day I had taken her innocence.
I don't deserve her. I don't deserve her love. But damn, did I want it. I wanted her, and her love, more than anything in the world. And I know I have to fight like hell to get it.
And fight like hell, I will. I will crawl on my hands and knees and beg for her forgiveness if that's what it takes to gain her trust once more. Carly West will be worth the fight.
I lifted up my right hand to gently rub her soft cheek. I saw her eye lids flutter and I quickly moved my hand away. I waited for her to open her eyes but they never did. She was in deep sleep.
Once again, I went to touch her cheek. This time, I let my fingertip trace the outline of her pink lips. They were so soft and I wanted to taste them to see if they're as sweet as they looked.
"You're so beautiful, Carly." I whispered. I hoped that she heard me in her dreams. "I'm so damn sorry, baby girl. I'm so sorry."
I saw her eyelids flutter some more and I moved my hand to hold her hand, the one that was placed on my naked chest.
I secretly wanted her to wake up but I know that she needed to sleep. Carly hid it well but I noticed the way she was shaking when she saw that her safe house was broken in to.
I tried to comfort her but she had denied me. I didn't want her to sleep alone so I snuck inside her room and slept on her bed side. I thought someone had gotten in when I heard her wake up from her nightmare. I wanted to protect her from everything, even her dreams, but I could only do it if she let me.
"I just want to protect you, baby." I whispered to her. "Let me help you. I'm here for you. I care, Carly. I know you don't believe me, but I do. I care a lot about you."
Her breathing an heart rate was still even and I knew she was still asleep. I sighed. I deserved the anger she clearly tried to show but I knew she still cared. I could see her eyes soften every time she looks at me, even if her words cut like a knife.
I looked over at the glow of the digital clock on her bed side table.
5:13AM.
Damn, it was going to be a long day.
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