The Girl Who Feared Men (SAMPLE)

Chapter 27: The New Normal

Ellie

"When did they become a thing?" Julianna points at Chase and Megan sitting side by side at an empty table. They don't sit alone because they have no one to sit with. They sit alone because they enjoy each others company more than they do others. It's cute. I'm happy they're together especially after everything they've been through to get to where they are now.

"When Chase invited Megan and I to his family's Thanksgiving football game," I say before popping one of the fries I got from the cafeteria into my mouth. We sit at our usual table eating our usual lunches and talking about the things we usually talk about.

Everything has gone back to a weird version of normal. Kiara, Julianna, and I are a united front. Sonia still hates everyone. Cole and I are friends. Justin and Devon occasionally say hi to me in the halls, and Chase and Megan are together.

The new normal.

For some strange reason, I can't seem to shake off the feeling that something's off. Like the Earth is spinning a few degrees off its axis. I can't stop feeling like the ground beneath me isn't leveled. It's like my focus is a few inches off and I'm not sure why.

Maybe it's my recent progress. I see things in a new light now. After I relived the incident, I went through hours of debriefing with Dr. Prachard. All that taught me that there are no similarities with Danny and any boy I've met so far. It's made me a lot more laid back and a lot less focused. I can still tell you the exact number of boys in every class I have but if a boy taps my shoulder, I probably won't ram my elbow into his rib cage.

Progress.

"Chase invited you to meet his family!?" Kiara leans in, a lot more intrigued now than she was a few seconds ago.

"Well, I've already met them. He wanted me to meet them again." I explain.

"So you guys are friends now?" Julianna adds as she munches on a homemade salad.

"...Yeah. I think so." I say.

Chase inviting me to his family gatherings have really shifted the dynamic of our relationship. Chase might actually be my closest guy friend.

Of course, there's Cole, but Cole and I don't hang out as much as Chase and I do. And I don't mind that. I like Chase's presence. He's flawed. Like me. He is also really aware of my boundaries and tries his best not to cross them. It's weird to admit but Chase seems to understand me a lot more than Cole does but maybe that's because we've spent so much time together. I'm sure Cole will figure all these things out too. It'll just take time.

"Wow, your really kicking your phobia's ass. You're even going on a date with COLE! Things are really looking up for you, El." Kiara swings her arm around my neck.

I raise a finger to protest. "Uh, not a date. We are just two friends going to the Winter Carnival together."

Kiara and Julianna exchange a knowing glance before staring at me with concerned eyes. "Ellie... it is universally known that if a person asks another person to a carnival, they are asking said person on a date."

"I was supposed to go to the carnival with you guys," I reason.

"That's different," Julianna says.

I raise a brow. "How? You guys are my friends. I mean, sure, we're the same gender but that doesn't count in your case and you guys aren't trying to get in my pants."

"Don't give us any ideas." Kiara tosses a cocky wink in my direction.

Julianna smacks Kiara on the arm. As Kiara is rubbing the place where she hit, Julianna looks me in the eyes. "Ellie." She says slowly. "Have you ever dated...anyone?"