The Origins Trilogy

Chapter 6

I was sitting in my office, looking over my evaluations from the day prior, I was doing everything within my power to just focus on what I had to do, but he kept popping in my head. Every second I would try to change the direction of my thoughts or move around, or do anything to get him out of my head, would only make me think about him more.

I'd remembered yesterday's events with the Joker with perfect precision, it was as if my mind was on instant replay throughout the entirety of my workday. The feelings were the most present in my head at the moment, the fear, the anticipation, the thrill. I'd never known excitement like this, and I don't think my body was ready to give it up just yet.

As soon as my workday was up, I practically ran home, and masturbated fiercely, he'd turned me on so much and I just couldn't contain myself. I came violently and fully on my kitchen floor and the release that it gave me was something I hadn't felt since Sam.

Sam may have been with dozens of guys and girls alike, but he was my first and my only. I'm only twenty-six, and the only guy I have ever been with was my best friend. It's not like I wasn't offered the chance, it's just that the guys that were usually attracted to me weren't my type, and the guys that were my type weren't interested.

Unlike Sam, I didn't exude a sexiness that made men and women go wild, even before he was able to literally put people under his thrall, I'm sure that without that he would still be just as sultry. I was the exact opposite, so the whole having sex thing was just out of the question for me. I'd been fine with it because Sam and I stopped fooling around during sophomore year, so I've had ten years to work on controlling my urges.

Sure, it was hard, both literally and figuratively, but once I made myself to busy to think about my sexual appetite, it soon faded away. It wasn't until yesterday, I remembered what it was like to be turned on, at first with Sam, and then the final nail in the head with the Joker. What frightened me the most was just how much of an effect this man had on me.

Sam and I have actually slept together, and sure I may have been turned on at the sight of his nearly naked body, but I was still able to contain my libido for the most part. But the moment I laid eyes on that green haired man, the way he spoke to me, the look in his eyes, the fear he etched through my body, I was completely out of control.

I knew it had to be a result of years of repressing my sexual desire, I knew that the reason that I was feeling that way was just that deep down I was still searching for some excitement in my life, and this man was giving that to me tenfold. That was the good thing about studying psychiatry, it helped you rationalize the irrational, and helped me realize that the response I had was entirely normal.

Thankfully, that was the last time I was going to see that man, and I no longer had to worry about further analyzing my emotions. It was just a freak occurrence is all, a simple transference, I was sad about Sam, hurt, and that man was just there, a metaphorical charge that jumpstarted the dead battery left by Sam.

And that little incident that happened when I got home wasn't about the Joker, it was about Sam, and the sexual relationship we once shared together. It was just me trying to get it all out of my system, and now its expelled, now I can give my full attention to my actual patients.

Satisfied with my explanation, I went back to the task at hand, I finished up the last of imputing my evaluations and focused on the notes that I took from the first session I had with same the other day. Our second session was happening today and I wanted to make sure that I had all my facts together and went in with a better strategy than the first.

I definitely hit a nerve talking about Marc, but that comment he made about destroying a family, that was one that seemed to peak my interest most.