The New God Series Shorts and One Shots.

Motherhood

A/N Obviously this is an early one from shortly after Luke was born. I came up with this idea and thought it would be cute so here it is.

Amber's Point of view

I was sitting on my couch reading while Luke was playing with a toy. Being a mother certainly wasn't easy, but honestly, I thought it was worth it. until now I hadn't really understood just how much a parent loves their child, but it had become clear to me that there was no-one else in this world that I loved more than my little boy. He may not have been planned but even though it's tough at times I didn't regret having him.

Sure, I still wished that Percy could be here, but I knew he couldn't although he was still doing what he could for us. It saddened me that he was missing all the important moments in Luke's childhood but we couldn't really do anything about that since Percy and I had gotten ourselves into this situation, so now we had to deal with it. I put my book down when I heard Luke start to cry and went to see what he needed.

I quickly determined that he was hungry, so I went and sat him in his high chair and then went to get him some food. technically I'd been breastfeeding him, but I'd also started to give him some more solid foods since he was over six months old now and some of his teeth had started to come in. After he'd eaten I was taking him out of his high chair when he looked right at me and said, "mama,"

I'd known that he might start talking soon, but despite that, I hadn't been expecting him to speak at that moment. Obviously, I was surprised but happy since my little boy just said his first word, but since that word had been mama I was even happier. It's moments like that one that makes being a parent worth it. I love Luke so much that it's hard to describe

It was obvious now that Luke had gotten more of Percy's features than mine, but that didn't bother me, although his appearance meant that Percy was quite often on my mind. Well technically I thought about him a lot even before Luke was born, but now Luke's black hair and gold and sea green eyes always remind me of Percy.

I knew that I hadn't moved on from Percy, and honestly, I doubted I would. Despite what my friends always say I know there are other men out there, but I doubted there was anyone as perfect as Percy. He was everything I could ever want in a man. He was kind, handsome, loyal, I knew that the only reason he had left was that he wanted to protect me and Luke, and it was obvious that he wouldn't have left if he'd had any other choice.

I knew I still loved him, and a part of me hoped that maybe someday when Luke is older I could be with Percy again, but when I thought of that I would usually tell myself that by then Percy will have probably moved on from me, after all, I was nothing special, and there were plenty of other women out there, for that matter there might still be a few goddesses that weren't already taken.

I know when Percy and I were together he would always tell me that I was beautiful and that I shouldn't think so little of myself, but I couldn't see what he apparently saw in me, especially now after having Luke since I'd put on quite a bit of weight during my pregnancy. Regardless I tried not to dwell on all that since there wasn't much point in dwelling on it since I really couldn't know for sure what would happen, I would just have to wait and see what would happen.

Maybe I would eventually move on and find someone else, or maybe Percy would come back to me, no matter what happens in the future Luke will always be my first priority since there is nothing that is more important to me than him. Even before I met Percy I'd known that I'd wanted to find the right guy, and eventually have at least one child, I'd just never expected to do that so soon.

After I got to know him I'd been sure that Percy was the right guy, but I hadn't expected that he would leave me, or that we would be so careless when we eventually agreed to have sex. I should have been smarter, but I'd gotten caught up in the heat of the moment and never thought to mention it before it was too late.

I may not have planned on Becoming a mother so soon, but I was glad that I hadn't decided to have an abortion, or give Luke up for adoption, he's more important to me than anything, and even if I could go back and change what happened I don't think I would since I love Luke so much and even though Percy can't be here I'm mostly happy to just have Luke.

Right now, I'm trying to find a better job, so it will be a little easier to support us, after all taking care of a baby isn't easy and eventually I will have to go back to work, even though right now I'm off on maternity leave. For that same reason, I'm also looking into daycares since I have to go back to work but Luke will also still need to be taken care of while I can't be home with him.

Later that day I was texting my friend Sarah. Our brief conversation went something like this,

Sup? She asked me

Luke said his first word earlier today. I replied since I was still happy about that.

That's great, what was it? She asked.

Mama, I replied.

How about you? I asked wondering what was going on in her life since I hadn't talked to her in a little while, after all, Luke was keeping me busy.

She replied, Chen and I went on a date the other day.

Oh, how was it? I asked.

She replied. Great, we went for dinner, and then we went to a movie.

I replied. Sounds nice, you really like him, don't you?

She replied, Yes, he might be the one.

I ended the conversation shortly after that when Luke made it clear that he needed something else, and this time it turned out to be his diaper. Once again, I took care of him and afterward I decided I just wanted to hold him for a little while. He was already getting big since he'd been pretty big when he was born, and I'd had to get him larger clothes than what most babies his age usually wear.

That didn't bother me though, when I had him I was just glad that he was healthy, and how he looked didn't really matter that much to me, but honestly, he was adorable and I had never loved anyone as much as I love my son. I just wished that he wouldn't have to be in danger, but unfortunately, I knew that eventually he would and there would be nothing I could do to stop it no matter how much I wanted to.

Smiling I began to tickle him causing him to giggle. Before too long though I stopped and held him for a little longer before I eventually put him down for a nap. I knew that Sarah planned on coming to visit me tomorrow since despite being annoyed that Percy left me to go through my pregnancy and then raise Luke on my own, even she had to admit that Luke was adorable and she wanted to see him as well even though it seemed like he had taken after Percy more than me.