Extend Our Reach (Rocket-shipping Fan fiction)

18 ~Broken Heart to Heart

James and Ash sat on the jutting edge  of the cliff, watching the sky grow purple, the stars just starting to show.

James rested his hands behind his head and lay, relaxed, against the cliff edge. Ash copied him, also relaxing. Pikachu curled up against Ash's side, mewling quietly as he drifted into slumber.

"The sunsets here are so beautiful," James piped up suddenly, smiling slightly.

"Yeah, they are," Ash replied, grinning.

"The stars are starting to show," James pointed up a the sky, secretly saddened by a thought in his head.

'I wonder if Jessie's one of the stars now?' James thought to himself, his smile falling away.

He let his eyes close as he exhaled deeply; he was tired, despite not having done anything for days. Grief was weighing on his heart like a ton of bricks, suffocating him more with every attempt he made to breathe. The guilt was crushing him; he was alive. He was alive but Jessie wasn't. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair.

He opened his eyes again, to a sky as dark as tarmac. The white balls of light shone brightly, their glow rivaled only by the slowly rising moon.

"There's a Pokemon that I think you should meet," Ash said, "If I let them out, do you promise you won't try to steal him?"

"I'm in no mood to be stealing anything," James replied, "So I promise."

"Litten, come out!" 

Litten, a firey little cat Pokemon, came out of his Poke-ball, and stood beside Pikachu.

"Litten knows what it's like to lose somebody. He lost his buddy, Stoutland, a while ago," Ash said, introducing Litten.

"It's nice to meet you, Litten," James sat up and offered his hand to the small cat Pokemon. Litten sniffed it hesitantly, and then gave James' gloved hand a tentative lick.

"He likes you," Ash laughed.

James smiled at Litten, and gently began petting him; it felt comforting to be in a Pokemon's company - a Pokemon that liked him. Most Pokemon either ran in fear from him, or sent him spiraling through the air.

"I like Litten too," James replied.

Litten meowed and leaped on to James' lap. It meowed to James, saying to him that he knew it was hard. Though James didn't understand completely, he seemed to know what the Litten meant.

"You want to make me feel better?" James asked, "Well I think you're awfully sweet."

"Do you still want to talk about it?" Ash asked.

"Hmm?" James looked back at Ash; Litten had almost made him forget that the twerp was there too! James nodded.

"I do," James answered, "But I don't want to be a pain."

"Don't worry! It's my duty as a Pokemon trainer!" Ash said determinedly, pumping his fist.

"Alright then," James chuckled, "If you're sure."

James wasn't really sure what to say. He sat, thinking silently as he stroked Litten.

"You miss Jessie?" Ash asked, knowing the expression on James face.

James nodded. His hand paused in mid air as he was petting Litten.

"So much," James said, "And I just wish that I hadn't let her go on that mission."

His vision blurred as his eyes teared up. He wanted to talk about Jessie - he did - but he didn't want to feel sad. He didn't want to cry, but he knew there was no way he couldn't. Even the thought of Jessie was enough to make him tear up. But wasn't that why he was talking to the twerp? To be sad? To talk about how he felt?

"Jessie should be here now, but I let her go on that mission. I let her die," James said. A tear rolled down his cheek. He resumed petting Litten, not bothering to wipe the tears away. There wasn't any point; they would only keep falling.

"Don't say that, James," Ash said pitifully, "It's not your fault!"

"But what if it is?"

"If it's anyone's fault, wouldn't it be your boss'?" 

James sniffed and then replied,

"I s-suppose so."

He hung his head, his hair falling over his tear-stained face. He didn't know what to say.

Ash had to admit to himself, it felt strange to be helping his sworn enemy. And it did feel a little awkward, comforting an adult. It felt even more awkward on account of the fact that he was crying. But Ash knew that he couldn't help it; he'd just lost his best friend. And after all, it was his duty as a Pokemon trainer to help!

Suddenly, Litten jumped up and licked a tear off James' cheek, catching him by surprise. He met the small Pokemon's eyes and smiled a teary smile; it was so sweet of the Pokemon to comfort him. It was so kind of the twerp to be there for him; the guilt almost made him feel worse. He didn't deserve to be comforted by Ash. He didn't truly felt that he deserved to be comforted by anybody.

"James?"

James looked up to meet Ash's eyes, a faint trace of a smile still ghosting his expression.

"I know that this is really tough, and it probably hurts a bunch. But it will get easier for you one day. Jessie wouldn't want you to be sad; she'd want you to be happy, because you probably made her happy," Ash said, hoping that it was the right thing to say.

James' smile fell, exposing a vague look of confusion and fear. Then his face crumpled, Ash's words touching the emptiness in his heart.

Ash was taken aback by a sudden embrace from James, tight and emotional. James held Ash close to his chest, gratitude bleeding through him. Ash slowly embraced James back, feeling him begin to sob. 

It was a strange sight to any onlooker; a young boy holding a young man as he sobbed; it would seem even stranger if the onlooker happened to know that they were enemies. But to anyone who knew Ash, this wouldn't seem strange at all.

James was at the mercy of his broken heart, and he couldn't conceal the aching.

"It's going to be okay," Ash whispered, "It's okay. Let it out."

James squeezed harder, the emptiness breaking loose through his sobs. He clung to the young Pokemon trainer, seemingly the only grounding thing. 

He fought for control, and slowly managed to grasp a hold of himself. He sobs stuttered to a stop and he let go of Ash. He sniffed and wiped his eyes fiercely.

The two exchanged a look and then stood up. They jumped down from the rock.

"Thank you, Ash," James said, offering his hand to the boy. Ash shook it and replied,

"You're welcome! I have to get going now; I have school in the morning!" He laughed.

James smiled and nodded. He waved briefly as Ash dashed off, back towards the town.

He turned around and looked up at the navy, star-patterned sky. He put his hands on his hips and stretched, yawning.

He took one more glance up at the stars, and then set off back into the town.

Maybe the twerp was right. Maybe it would be okay.

And the journey continues...