The Free Pass

Chapter 18

Mallory

The hardest part of extending the free pass to Shawn was not spending every waking moment wondering if he'd actually take me up on it.

I really didn't want to know.

But I also really wanted to know.

Was I having some regrets about the offer? Maybe. The thought of him in another woman's arms made me a little nuts, though honestly it wasn't her arms I didn't want him in.

Shawn was back in Charlottesville at the end of March for my doctor's appointment. It was the last time I'd see him before our wedding.

I was in class when his flight got in, so I met him at the hotel when I was done with school for the day. We had an hour to kill before going to the OB/GYN, so we curled upon the hotel bed so that Shawn could feel the baby.

As he rested his large warm hands on me, I listened to him tell me about how things were going with his music. He sang me the chorus of a new song he'd been working on, and told me about how he was eager to start recording.

The entire time he was talking and touching me, I was trying to figure out if anything was different about him. Was he being extra sweet because he'd hooked up with someone? Or was he being like that because he wanted to show me he wasn't interested in anyone else?

One good thing was that if he had used the free pass, it hadn't changed his mind about the wedding. He seemed pretty enthusiastic about our upcoming nuptials.

"I was thinking we could take a honeymoon in a year since we can't take one after the wedding," he said as he gently stroked my baby bump.

"What if I don't want to leave the baby?" I asked.

"Then the baby goes on the honeymoon with us."

"Where would we go?"

"Anywhere in the world that you want to visit, honey," he said into my ear.

When we were like this, it felt like love. It was definitely love on my end of it, but it felt like love on his part, too. I didn't know if I should thank him for being so affectionate and caring, or if I should punch him for faking his feelings for me.

The doctor visit was fine. She gave us a list of three doctors she'd researched in Toronto and suggested we call them right away so we could select one to deliver the baby. I'd graduate on a Saturday and we'd leave right afterwards. We planned to stop and stay in a hotel overnight before making the rest of the trip. The doctor said I should schedule an appointment with my new doctor for early the following week. I'd be on weekly check-ups at that point anyway.

We left the university hospital and went out to dinner. I was craving spicy food, so we went to an Indian place.

"Have all of your friends made arrangements for the wedding?" I asked as I dipped a piece of naan into my chana masala.

"As far as I know. Not everyone could make it since it's Easter weekend."

"Vera and Kris are both coming but they have to leave that night. They both live fairly close by, at least."

"We won't see each other until the wedding," Shawn said. I couldn't tell how he felt about this.

"It's only a couple weeks. I'll probably be twice as big by then, though. I feel like I'm growing at a ridiculous rate."

"You look beautiful," he said with a smile.

After dinner we went back to Shawn's hotel. I wished he could stay through the weekend, but he had some event to attend in New York. We said our goodbyes early the next morning when I dropped him at the airport. The next time I'd see him, we'd be getting married.