.::Bottom Evan Smutshots::.

Jar of Hearts

E:

Your presence calls to me, draws me in, but I pull away somehow. I can't get near you, for I am afraid of hearing your voice. The way you sweet talked me once, I'm afraid it'll work once more. Your sweet lies and half truths, they left me empty inside when you took their meaning and my heart with you.

"Who do you think you are?"

I wasn't your first, but I'm definitely not your last.

"Running 'round leaving scars"

He was young, inexperienced, and a mere child. Yet you went ahead and gave him your lies. You were inexperienced then, unaware that all your excuses and false claims of affection would earn you your first broken heart. When you look back at him, you don't feel regret, because he didn't know how to let go of the man that couldn't care less.

And that hurt you.

Because you were in his place once upon a time.

"Collecting your Jar of Hearts."

He was strong, the second soul you turned grey. He was from a broken home, yet a fierce personality resonated within their chest. It didn't last, because you tried too hard to be realistic. You kept affection and any sort of emotional attachment away, hoping it wouldn't end like the first. You had no idea that your words were confusing, misleading. So he broke it off, feeling hurt and betrayed.

And that hurt you.

Because you wondered if it was your lack of words.

"And tearing love apart"

I was next in your adventure. Captivated by your charm, enslaved by the words you used and the names you granted me. You were honoured, having my affection, because I admitted to having a broken past. You took me in, fed me lies, told me you'd come to me. You made me believe you cared because you were patient. I didn't know that you had my heart in your grasp so tightly that when we were over, I felt my chest empty and soul emptier. You broke me.

And that hurt you.

Because you weren't expecting it.

"You're gonna catch a cold"

Now, I sit back, watching your new victim. He's beautiful, he's a work of art both inside and out. Now you're fully trained, able to tell lies and keep them going for as long as you need. I hope you're better at hiding those lies. You hope so too, because you don't want to hurt him.

And that hurts you.

Because you know that someday you will.

"From the ice inside your soul"

You look down, aware of this truth.

"So don't come back for me, who do you think you are?"

J:

And as he takes his heart from my bloody hands, I smile, hoping the best for him.

"I never meant to hurt any of you.."

"And about my feelings I did not lie.."

I don't bother to look up, because I know he's turned and walked away. Slowly, I reach my hand in my pockets. Bloody bandages spill out from my attempts of mending what I hadn't caused. When in the end, I caused greater damage.

And that hurts.

Because hurting you was never my intent.

But now, it's a hobby.

Now, I do it because I love the attention.

The pleasure.

And now, I realize that the monster you think I am is the monster I once tried not to be.

And as my new toy tells me he loves me, I smile and play it off, complementing them.

"You're so sweet"

A sweet and oblivious soul.

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I think I forgot to add smut but shhshshshshshshshshhshsh