Until We Meet Again (Sirius x OFC)

Part 1 - Chapter 2: Friendship

After the feast, when all the students were in their common rooms and we had some time to spare before bed, I asked Remus to come into my office. The room was round and a bit crammed. Walking up a hidden flight of stairs, you could reach my bedroom. I made us a nice cup of tea and lit a fire. It was rather chilly outside, even for September, and the cold stone walls of the castle didn't help with that.

"You have it nice here," said Remus, inspecting the dozens of books that were covering the walls in my office. There wasn't much free space here, except for the wall right around the fireplace. There were different stacks of rune dictionaries for the students, plus quite of lot of the translations I had written: "translated by Alia Allington" they would write on the covers. Remus noticed. "You are quite a successful translator."

"Well, there wasn't much else I did before working here," I commented. It was true, translating and reading were what kept my mind preoccupied during the first few years alone. Every thought of Sirius and my dead friends would lead to crying fits back then, I really wasn't much use to anyone. It was hardest when Remus was away trying to find his own peace of mind. As much as it helped that we were there for each other, almost like the siblings we never had, we also needed those periods of time we spent all alone. Sometimes, our presence would remind us too much of what we had lost.

"You have always been very talented," Remus argued. "Don't play it down. Even with all the grief you managed to be successful."

"Well, that's not exactly the success I wanted..." I took a deep breath when I felt the tears forming in my eyes . "It can't replace the family I always thought I'd have. Not just with Sirius... but with all of you."

"I know," Remus said with a pain-filled expression. "Nothing can replace that."

We sat down on the couch in front of one of my bedroom windows – the place I usually used for reading. It was nice to have someone here with me now. I didn't feel as lonely anymore.

"How are you doing?" I asked carefully. "You don't look so well." Remus had never been one to talk much about his whereabouts. He was so quiet sometimes.

"I'm okay," he said, his usual answer to this question. "Severus is kind enough to brew me Wolfsbane Potion, I think that will help. The last few months weren't the best I ever had, to be honest."

I put my hand on his knee, causing him to smile. "It's going to be okay. You know I'm always there for you. Don't try to solve everything all by yourself."

"Only if you promise me the same thing," Remus replied with a knowing glance.

I let out a chuckle. "Promise."

* * *

Besides Ravenclaw common room, the library quickly became my second home. I had found a few friends in Ravenclaw already, but there was one person in particular that made me feel at home here in Hogwarts. It was a Gryffindor I always met in front of this one bookshelf. His name was Remus and he was a brown-haired  boy with a scarred face and a kind smile. We usually did our homework together and since he was a half-blood as well, we could share a few stories with each other that some of our friends wouldn't understand.

Our first few years at Hogwarts passed really fast. My father had me come home during all of the Holidays, even Christmas. By now he had accepted my sorting, glad that it was Ravenclaw and not Gryffindor, at least. He said I was too sensitive and peculiar to be a Slytherin anyway. But he was still so strict with me, that I dreaded going home.

He and my mom had moved abroad in my second year. At first, I didn't understand why but as I got older, I realized it was because my dad was scared for his safety with the Death Eaters gaining more power, wiping out traitors in the blink of an eye. Both pairs of my grandparents still lived in England, though. My dad's parents resided in Brighton and my mom's parents (the muggles) near London. So, I spent most of my holidays in Brighton with my dad's family. The rest of the time I was in Germany, where my parents lived now. I barely saw my muggle family. 

Whenever I got home, my dad would cut my hair short. I was sure there was a spell to grow them back, but I didn't dare do it. He said I spent too much time worrying about my looks and that it distracted me from learning. My grades were perfect, though, I was especially good in Charms and from third year on in Ancient Runes. My mom one day told me, it was because my dad wanted to make sure I don't get involved with any boys.

He didn't have to worry about that, though. None of the boys in Hogwarts took an interest in me and as soon as my hair was short again, some of them even laughed about me. Except for Remus, but he spent more times with his friends than with me now. 

It was because of him, that I got to know Lily Evans in third year. We quickly became friends once Remus had introduced her to me in the library one day. She was a Gryffindor like him. My Ravenclaw peers often argued that I had too many Gryffindor friends. I told them I didn't care about house rivalries. I only cared about the people. They agreed heavily, as if it was a revolutionary thought.

Lily quickly became my best friend. She was a kind soul; my quietness didn't bother her and she even gave me some tips on how to style my hair when it got cut short again. Honestly, it wasn't the hair that bothered me, what really annoyed me was that my dad dictated me how I needed to look and what I needed to do. Lily said I needed to be more rebellious and I knew she was right, but there was a reason why I wasn't in Gryffindor: I was a coward.

* * *

October approached quickly. The air got colder, and the days got shorter. Life at Hogwarts was as normal as could be, considering the dementors lingering around. But the tension was palpable. Every news about Sirius or any other conspiracies made the students nervous. Some of the teachers as well.

One morning, the students were brooding over their copies of the Daily Prophet and I knew something was off again. After breakfast, I snatched a copy and then made my way to the classroom I was supposed to be giving a class in... in about ten minutes. I hurried down the hallway and put the newspaper in a pocket of my robes. I had to wait a little while later until I could read it.

All the time, I couldn't shake off the picture of Sirius's screaming face on the cover. Whenever I saw the posters and photos of his face, I felt the urge to scream and cry at the same time. It was weird how even after all these years I still couldn't let him go. Seeing the pain in his eyes was the worst for me. When you love someone, you want them to be happy, to be free from all suffering. The contrary had happened to him and it was unbearable for me to see it.