Until We Meet Again (Sirius x OFC)

Part 2 - Chapter 22: House Black

Later, long after dinner, I was lying in bed reading while Nyx was sleeping at my feet. Earlier this week I had decided to get a comfortable armchair from one of the downstairs rooms up here in front of the fireplace. Sirius actually didn't want it here, he said it was unnecessary, but I insisted because I wanted to make our room cozier. See, now Sirius was sitting in said armchair staring into the flames with his mind lost in thoughts. It had been a cool and rainy August day here in London, even now you could hear the drops drumming against the windows.

I put my book aside, not able to focus anyway with Sirius sitting there like that. I was wearing my nightgown by now, since it was late at night, but he was still fully dressed. From where he sat, he was half facing the door, half facing the fireplace, but he would have seen me come over from the corner of his eye had he paid attention. I stood beside him, running my hand through his soft hair for a moment, and then sat down on the armrest.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked him calmly. Actually, I knew the answer, but I wanted him to say it to me. To say anything at all, really.

At first, he didn't answer, but then after a low sigh, he spoke. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Never mind, I know what's up anyway."

At that he looked up to me, just as grim-faced as he had been all day. He wasn't in a good mood very often lately. But today it was especially bad after Severus's remarks at the meeting and the argument with Molly later on.

"I thought Harry's arrival would make you feel better," I said.

"I amhappy he's here," Sirius replied, eyes back to the fire.

"Another thing... You really shouldn't be so hard on Molly. She only means well."

"Ah, so you're on her side," he stated with a scowl.

"Baby..." I sighed and scooted onto his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck. Sirius held me steady, the first time he had actually physically reacted to my presence. "I'll always be on yourside, but Molly only wants to protect the kids. She has done so much for Harry that we should be grateful for. She deserves your respect, even if you two disagree on certain things. And about the meeting earlier: You know that Severus only says these things because he wants to get under your skin. He knows exactly why you can't do the same things he can do for the Order. You mustn't let him get to you."

Sirius shook his head. "No, the thing that bothers me is that he's right. I'm useless while everyone else is risking their lives. And even Molly has something against me. I feel like a child that's been grounded for no reason by people who have no right to do so."

"I get that, really, but that's no one's fault other than Pettigrew's or maybe the Ministry's. Your time will come, my love, our fight has only just begun." I tried to reason with him, but Sirius was Sirius and that meant he barely accepted reason in a state of emotional distress. "Voldemort won't be this quiet for long as soon as he has gathered enough people. We most likely can't prevent that, no matter how hard we try, and when he reveals himself for good, and Pettigrew shows up, you're a free man."

"But that can still take ages, Ally, and we don't know what happens until then. I want to help now."

"But you are," I argued.

"You don't get it," he said, turning his face away from me again. I felt a sting at these words, he had never before said anything like this to me, let alone in such a cold tone.

"You know, this is not just about you, Sirius. This is about all of our lives, most of all Harry's. He needs you. And so do I, more than you think. Molly was right, sometimes you're acting too rashly and forget that we all care and want what's best. I'm tired of this, as if it's not depressing enough already, you need to start arguments at any given occasion. Even with me. Maybe you shouldn't be thinking about yourself all the time."

I knew this was mean, because it was only partly true, but I was fed up by him pretending he was the only one who suffered. I tried to stand up, but he held me in place, a sorry expression on his face.

"You're right," he said. "I'm sorry, don't be mad."

"I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"It's just... I'll be back at Hogwarts soon. We only have a few weeks left together and I know this is a difficult situation for you, but soon you'll have to deal with it alone and I don't want you to do anything reckless."

He smiled at me, then, just a tiny fraction of a smile, but I knew he was glad I was worried about him. "I promise I won't," he said.

"You better." I again tried to get up, but this time he pulled me back, bringing his mouth to mine. I gladly kissed him back while his hand quickly found the hem of my nightgown and slid under it. I thought this was a good sign that his mood had lightened. Still, this topic wasn't done yet and I hated the amount of conflict that was brewing at the moment.

* * *

The next morning, I was up early, helping Molly with the Doxys in the drawing room like I had promised during dinner yesterday. The kids were helping, too, so it should go quickly. I was glad Molly wasn't angry with me, but when Sirius showed up a bit later, I noticed that they were both not over the argument, yet, even though they tried to be polite. It was a pity. We would all benefit from a better, calmer atmosphere.

But that's not easy with so many feisty people in one house.

In the end, we took far longer than I had expected, mostly due to the boys doing nonsense and the huge amount of Doxys that I hadn't anticipated. I hadn't been in many houses of pure-blood wizarding families before, only the one of my father's parents. That was ages ago, I remember it being quite similar to Grimmauld Place but not as extreme since they weren't as rich, and of course it wasn't as run-down back then. Now I was wondering if it looked just like this now that one of my cousins owned it. I had no contact to any of my family members and I was pretty sure there was almost no one left.

Not that I missed them. I believed in chosen family and mine was here with Remus and Sirius, and of course Harry.

Today wasn't a good day, so we were all kind of tense. I had to have Sirius's mum scream at me about three times when I helped close the curtain after Molly and Mundungus had started fighting. Then, when I went back upstairs right behind Sirius, we found Kreacher in the drawing room. Sirius made him leave, but he as well insulted me as he walked past me if only under his breath. And even though Sirius had told him multiple times that he should stop, Kreacher still talked about the traitor that my father was and how I was an unworthy half-blood with a muggle mother, shouldn't be here in this noble house let alone engaged to a Black – even if Sirius too was a traitor. He kept mumbling how 'his mistress' would hate me and the other filthy people in the house, how Sirius continued to insult his name bringing me here et cetera.

Not that I cared what he thought of me, but this house was depressing, as a whole as well as each and every little part of it.

I only now noticed the Black's family tree on the tapestry, since I had been too caught up with the Doxys earlier. Sirius showed Harry and me where his picture once was before it was burned out. Some of my ancestors where on there as well. But that was lots of generations ago and I didn't know any of them, not even from stories. Pure-blooded families only encouraged relationships with other pure-bloods, so it was no wonder that my dad's ancestors had ties to the Black family. It was only good that Sirius and I weren't directly related – imagine the drama upon finding that out.

Molly brought up sandwiches for lunch then and I helped her, leaving Sirius and Harry to their conversation. We still had so much to do in this house, it felt as though we were getting nowhere nearer our goal.