The Alpha's Human Mate

The Funeral

 It's been three days since I killed Ryan Harold Livingston. He was 26 when he died, and was a Father, beloved Husband, Son, Brother, Grand-son, Nephew, Cousin, and cherished friend. He loved to be active and was always in the good mood to be around friends and family. He was a pusher never gave up, and he was always there for anyone who needed help or advice. Ryan Harold Livingston was a good man and a sad loss to this pack, community, his friends, and family." Another tear made its way down on my cheek. Today at 4:30 p.m Ryan's funeral will be taking place, and it's all my fault. Everyone keeps telling me that it's not my fault, and telling me that I just couldn't control my wolf but that's just bullshit. The real reason is that I'm a murderous heartless person. I sit in my room that I've been in since I woke up in Luke's bed. I locked myself in my room, not wanting to face the world. I know that they're all probably saying what a heartless bitch I am, and I don't blame them. Luke has tried getting me out of my room, but I told him in need to be alone. I've been yelling at my wolf until she's decided to hide somewhere deep inside of my mind. I look down at my arm and see those blue sparkly words on my arm. Another tear falls this time it falls directly on the word anger. I close my eyes remembering the moment I squeezed the life out of the poor man. It was all because of my anger. I shake my head my anger coming again because I'm mad at myself and my frick'en wolf. I open my eyes and grab my phone I was given a while back. I turn it on and see that it's already 3:55 p.m. I groaned knowing that the funeral started in less than an hour. I slid off my bed and head into the bathroom. I look into the mirror and see a miserable looking girl. I sigh and begin fixing my makeup and hair. I put on a dark shade of lipstick and some black eyeshadow. I put on a light amount of foundation, and curl my hair lightly. I then go to the dress I have picked out. I slip it on and look at myself in the mirror. 

                            (Not what Ember, looks like. Just the dress she's wearing) 

I sigh at my complexion. This is the face of someone who murdered someone. I'm not pretty and innocent, I'm a guilty murder. I shake my head to myself and leave my bathroom. I sit on my bed wishing time would freeze. I could almost imagine everyone staring at me and saying "There's the girl who murdered Ryan." A tear left my eye and I'm thankful that I'd put on waterproof mascara. I check my phone and see that it's 4:20 p.m. I decide to start making my way to the funeral, I'd be rude to be late for the funeral I caused. I walk to m bedroom door and turn the cold doorknob. I mentally prepare myself, and then I leave my room. I walk down the hallway and everything seems darker. I make my way downstairs and passed the kitchen. I pass many pack members and they all stare at me. I walk all the way to the gathering space, and once I'm there by the two huge doors I see a reef of roses hanging on each door. I open the door, and the whole room gets quiet. I was told that I'm to sit in the first row, great. I walk silently to my seat the only noise is my high heels clicking against the floor. I don't dare look at the pack members, I just keep my head down the whole walk to my seat. I finally find a seat in the front row with my name plastered on it. I sit down in the folding chair and sit silently fidgeting with my hands. I then feel a warm presence next to me, and I instantly know that it's Luke. I ignore him and I hear my wolf winning and I push her away.
Luke then says,"What did I tell you about pushing you're wolf away." He had a joking tone to his voice, but this was no time for any jokes.
I then say,"Well the reason why we're all here is that I didn't push my wolf away." My voice was full of venom, but not towards him. I was mad and upset with myself, and Luke knows that. Luke puts a hand around my neck but I just shrug it off. I don't deserve anyone's pity. Luke sighs and I can feel that he's hurt. We sit in silence and wait as the gathering room fills up with pack members. After waiting around 15 minutes the whole gathering room was filled. A priest in a black tux came walking down the aisle with a bible in his hands. He gets to the wooden altar and sets his bible on the alter gently. He lifts his hands up toward the right and left.