Stormy »zjm«

Chapter Nineteen

"He threats m-me"

As soon as the words were spoken I couldn't take them back and I was happy about that.

I took a deep breathe, held my air and looked at my nervously fiddeling fingers.

"He what? You can't just say threats, Rain, what exactly does he do?", he pushed farther now confusion and shock visible on his features. His hand grasped mine in a natural manner, smoothing my fingers and then his whole attention was on my face again.

"What does he do, Rain?", he asked again a bit more calm now to comfort me. It helped but I still couldn't put anything in words. What was even happening right now?

"He... just like... does things that make me uncomfortable", I tried to put it the most unspectacular way.

His hand that held mine noticeably tensed and grasped it harder than before.

"What do you mean by that? Rain, please be completely honest and straight forward. I promised you I wouldn't do anything you wouldn't want after you told me. Trust me"

My face lifted up and I searched for his eyes in a desperate attempt to find the courage and tell him everything.

"Jonah said, that... he said that he wanted my... uhm, innocence. A-And if I told anyone, he would... do something. Like, to me. H-He always waits for me after school and reminds me of his intentions and I'm scared of him, I-I'm so scared of him, I don't know what he plans next. He hurts me both physically and mentally and he finds his joy in that"

By now my mouth was dry opposite to my now again wet cheeks and quivering lips. My eyes started hurting from all the crying and I couldn't stop it.

Zayn was quiet. Unbelievably quiet. I didn't like that. I needed to know what he felt and what he thought.

"I-I'm so sorry", he whispered and I wasn't sure but I think I heard a crack in his voice. Softly he pulled me into his warm, T-shirt cladded chest and once again it was me ruining one of his nice shirts. His perfume was very prominent as always.

"I wont let that happen, Rain, I wont let anything happen to you. I'll do anything to keep you save, I'm so sorry. I should've known earlier", he cooed

"Since when?", he questioned. What should I say now?

The truth, Rain.

"Last year. H-He nearly uhm... r-raped me last year but then a teacher, apparently Ms Devon spotted us and they ran. Then he left me alone for a long time. But he started again a few weeks ago or something"

Every oh so gentle touch left and he nearly jumped a few inches to the side.

"I...", he started unable to finish as he looked around as if he was trying to find some logical sense in everything I've told him.

Finally his view fell on me again causing me to drop my face so he wouldn't be able to see my wet cheeks. I hated my face even more when I was crying.

"Look at me", he ordered, voice low yet firm. I didn't.

"Look at me, Rain", he tried again without success.

He was silent for mere seconds before gently starting to wipe my tear stained cheek with his thumb.

"Hey", he whispered softly trying to soothe my sobs.

"You can trust me, okay? I'm so incredibly sorry for accussing you of something like that I should've known better. I wont do anything like him, okay? You can trust me", he reassured me apologizing for his earlier behaviour.