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Someone Puts My Whiny Bitch Ass In Place

tw ; chloe uses some super harsh language in this so be careful!!! she also kinda makes fun of eating disorders??? because she's kinda being an asshole. it's really subtle though, blink and you'll miss it. just stay safe babes!!! <3<3<3

  After two days of postponing the inevitable, I decided to go to Chloe's house, so that I could finally understand what she told Rich that was apparently so insanely fucked up that Rich decided whatever he told Jeremy about me was justified.

  To recap the past two days, it's been a nightmare.

  I called Jake six times, and he didn't pick up once. I knocked at Christine's door and she didn't open up for me, even though the lights were on so she had to be in there somewhere.

  I even went to Jeremy's house, looked at the door, even put my hand on the doorknob before an aching feeling enveloped my heart and the sudden thought came over me:

  Oh.

  Oh.

  Maybe I can't do this.

  I went home that day, without talking to Jeremy, or anyone for that matter.

  Going to Chloe's house was the big next hurdle that I had to jump in my mind. It made me want to tear my hair out and scream until I lost my voice, but I'd have to face her one day. The sooner I talk to her, the sooner I'll get to talk to Jeremy again.

  Or the sooner I'll lash out and tell her some stupid shit that she then tells to Jeremy and then he sees what a truly abusive piece of shit I am.

  Maybe I'm overthinking this.

  I forced myself to disassociate from the situation. I separate my feelings from the circumstances and realize that I need to get this over with.

Correction: That's what I tried to do.

Instead of arriving at Chloe's house confident and ready for a conversation, I arrived there feeling out of myself and self-pity. Instead of my first impression being some cool ass power stance, I looked like I was a recovering alcoholic. Things weren't working in my favour today.

I knocked at the door nine times before Chloe opened up.

When she opened up, she didn't look annoyed, which stumped me. She didn't look angry, or upset. All she did was deadpan me. I didn't know whether to be comforted or terrified by that.

"What do you want, Michael?"

I purse my lips, "Hi... Chloe," I grab at straws for what to say, "Uhm... haven't talked in a while, huh?" I laugh nervously, scratching the back of my neck.

"Mhm. Yeah," her voice is monotone, and she was completely expressionless, "Huh. Wonder why."

Something about the way she said that pulled a trigger. I hadn't cried the past two days, but somehow it just started flowing. I barely cried. This didn't just happen. Yet somehow I couldn't stop it.

"If all you're here to do is cry on my doorstep, then get lost," Chloe sneered, but her voice still sounded so emotionless, and I didn't know what to make of it.