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I Am Now A Godparent To Two Cats Which Is Not A Responsibilty I Thought I'd Have

  Just recently the doctor had fully decided that radiation therapy was the right option for Jeremy, and that it would almost entirely rid him of cancer. All he had to do was get one or two small surgeries afterwards, and then he'd be healthy again.

  Jeremy would be healthy again.

  The thought made me giddy, but it was still a while before he could actually go through with it all. Him and his radiotherapy team have to have half a gazillion meetings where they just talk about his medical history and do some physical exams, which Jeremy was dreading.

  This all takes place over give or take two months, so until then, I got to keep my buddy with me at home. After that I'll have to go the hospital to visit him, which technically, should be a good thing, considering it means he's getting help, but hospitals always made me feel icky, so the whole situation kinda played with my nerves.

  Before that whole fiasco has the ability to make our friendship way harder, we decided we'd spend as much time together as humanly possible.

  I had a love-hate relationship with Jeremy's cats. Schnappi was pretty cool, but she definitely favoured Jeremy over me, which is understandable considering he's had her dumbass for twelve years.

Snoop just outright hated me. That fucker wanted me dead. Jeremy kept trying to make me feel better by saying: 'Don't worry, Michael! She never gets along with anyone!" but one time the mailman came to deliver their bills and Snoop rubbed right up that fucker's leg, so obviously Snoop just being an asshole is a fluke, and I just naturally repulse cats for some Godforsaken reason.

  At least Schnappi didn't totally hate my guts, though. She was pretty rad, honestly. Jeremy and I were just mindlessly babbling over some stupid shit and I had her in my lap.

  "Michael, I need you to promise me something."

  "Uh... okay?"

  "If anything happens to me, you need to take care of Schnappi and Snoop, okay?"

  I choke on oxygen so abruptly that Schnappi bounces out of my lap, "Wh-What? No, you said you were going to get radiotherapy, right? You're going to be okay? Did you lie to me? What do you—"

  "Jesus Christ, Michael! I'm fine! Yes, I'm getting radiotherapy. I didn't mean dying of cancer, that's already taken care of at this point, I meant like, while I was in the hospital getting my radiotherapy! My dad keeps forgetting to feed them so I need someone to give them love while I'm away," he has an amused smile on his face at how much I jumped to conclusions, but can you really blame me?

  "So... these are my godchildren?"

  Jeremy snorts, "Oh my god, yeah, sure."

  "Godchildren? That's like... a Jewish thing, right?"

  Jeremy looks at me in disbelief, "I'm so glad I'm friends with you," he lets out a cut off laugh, "Nope, I'm pretty sure Godchildren is a Christian thing, you're an atheist, right?"

  "Well, yeah, I'm honestly just pulling out all of my religious information out of my ass."

  "Classy," Jeremy comments, playing with Snoop's puffed up tail, "Okay, all you need to know is that Schnappi need a lot of pats, and Snoop likes being alone. That doesn't make her an asshole though, because she's not, she's a beautiful princess whom you do not deserve. Don't insult her."

  "Noted."

  "Schnappi has to take an anti-emetic pill everyday, because if she doesn't she'll get really sick, they're in the second cupboard from the right next to the cat food," he leans over to my side to scratch Schnappi's chin, "God, I love her. Look at her!"