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I Feel Like A Human Punching Bag But To Be Fair I Kinda Deserve It

  My first instinct was to call Rich and Jake so that I could ask them the following questions:

  •WHAT THE FUCK?
  •WHAT?
  •FUCK!
  •WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO BE SUCH A CUCK?
  •WHY!
  •HOW COME YOU ARE SUCH A CLOD?

  I was expecting to receive give or take a small paragraph for each of the above questions. Each paragraph varying from approximately five hundred words to one thousand. I'd be satisfied with a bit more than that as well.

  I need to calm down.

  Obviously Rich and Jake care a hecking lot about Jeremy, and I like to think that from the bottom of my heart that they wouldn't do this if they didn't have a good enough reason to. I'll explain to them that OH GOD PLEASE GIVE ME JEREMY BACK IA AMA VERYV SADA AND I WANTAA TO HUG HIM PELASE and maybe they'll understand.

  I decide to call Rich first, because he was the main cause of this. I also feel like Jake is way more understanding so if the call with Rich goes south then maybe Jake can comfort me.

  I went to his Instagram, leeched his phone number and hesitantly typed it into my phone.

  "Hello, Rich Goranski speaking, who is this?"

  "Uhm, uh... Michael! Michael Mell."

  "Oh."

  "I'm not here to like... fight with you or anything, I just wanted to talk... like, uhm... respectful adults and stuff. You explain what you know, and I'll... I'll... uh... y'know. Try to... debunk it, I guess?"

  "Jeremy told you to fuck off?"

  "What? No! I mean... kinda, but..." I laughed awkwardly, "Y'know. He thinks I don't care about him... which, uh, I do! I really do! And he... I don't really think he wants to be my friend anymore... because of... because of, uh... you."

  I heard Rich snort, "Good riddance."

  I try to ignore his snarky comment, "Can you please just tell me what you know?"

  "I know that you aren't good for Jeremy. End of discussion. Go find some other anxious kid with cancer to manipulate, you cunt."

  I actually freeze for a minute, not knowing how to respond to that, "Uhm... uh... m-manipulate? What?"

  "You don't think I'm that fucking dumb, do you? You know what Chloe told me, right?"

  "What? What did she tell you?"

  "Go ask her, why don't you?"

  "I... I don't know what you're talking about," I take a deep breath, "But I want you to know that... that I really, really care about him. I... I know I haven't, well... displayed that very well, but I promise you, that—"

  "You only started "caring" about him until after he got cancer, Michael," he sneers, "Don't act all innocent. Jeremy doesn't deserve your shit. He's in a really vulnerable place right now and I don't want you to drag him back in."

  "D-Drag him back in? Rich, what are you talking about?"

  "Listen, he got over you. It took him a while but sooner or later he was actually able to walk in the halls without someone asking him about you," he says, and something about that made me feel incredibly guilty. Why were kids asking him about me? "You realize he's in a bad place right now and will fall to his knees for anyone who gives him validation, so you manipulate him into thinking you're his friend. I've been in his kind of situation before, Michael."

  "I am his friend. When my mama heard he got cancer, she told me and so I felt bad for being such an asshole thirteen-year-old, so I wanted to apologize. That's why I visited. And then I fucked it up so I visited again to apologize for my shitty apology, and then we became friends. It's that simple."