Chapter Twenty Eight: Torture of the Soul

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"Lor? Hey, we're here." I opened my eyes, not sleeping, but trying to hold myself together for a few minutes more. Chloe had come and gotten me, picking me up from where I had sunken to the floor outside. She was frightened when she saw me, all traces of exhaustion gone as she had taken one look at me. I had sobbed as her kind eyes met mine, throwing myself in her arms as the pain and hurt tried to tear me apart from the inside. She had held me, telling me gently that we should go. I felt like a child as she had buckled me into the car, not that it mattered much. I was in a state of numb, my mind too frazzled to bother trying to pick apart how I felt or why I felt like this, so my personal safety was the least of my concerns.

Lucifer had left me.

All of my fears, all of my worries, had been right. It didnt matter that I loved him, didnt matter that I had given him everything, it wasnt enough for him. I wasnt enough for him.

Chloe led me into her house, an arm around me as I stumbled my way through the door. "Come in, come, lets sit on the couch." She led me over to the sofa, sitting me down and wrapping a blanket around me. I was shaking, I realized, not having noticed before. She sat across from me, trying to meet my gaze. "Hey hun, you want to tell me what happened?" Her voice was so kind, so motherly, that I caved, watery eyes meeting hers. "Lucifer kicked me out," I whispered, a tear falling down my cheek. I hiccuped, trying to hold the sobs back. I didnt want to keep crying, but my mind and body were at a disconnect, either one operating without asking the other whether this was the appropriate response.

"What? Why? What happened?" She grabbed my hands, squeezing and I shook my head, crying. I fell into her, needing someone to help me hold myself together. I felt like I was crumbling and I couldnt stop the pieces of myself from falling apart. "I-I t-told him that I-" I sobbed, gasping for breath in between words, "loved him!" I wailed. Chloes arms were around me and she rubbed my back, trying to soothe me. But all I felt was pain, pain and sorrow and regret. What had I done?

"Its okay, its okay," she murmured. I held onto her for dear life, not knowing what would happen if I let go. Im not sure how long we sat there, me clinging to her as she tried to calm me down, but eventually my sobs quieted enough that she was able to lie me down on the couch. I eventually drifted off to sleep, my mind shutting down and escaping the harshness of reality.

I was running, arms and legs pumping forward as I raced away from the killer. Keep running! I thought, dont stop! I could barely breathe and felt as if any moment I would collapse, but I pressed on, knowing that if I stopped I was going to die. I looked over my shoulder, seeing if they were still coming but seeing no one.

Not looking in front of me, I ran smack into someone, falling back. They reached out, catching me before I could hit the pavment. I looked up and let out a sigh of relief. Lucifer! He'll protect me! But as my eyes met his, cold and dark, a shiver of fear ran through me. "Lucifer, please, someones trying to kill me! You have to help me!" I cried. He only stared at me, stepping away from me. "Why should I?" He asked, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes. My lip trembled, "please, I dont want to die!"

He laughed, shaking his head. "Thats not my problem, love. You humans, so fragile, all die eventually anyways. Why not cut the rope early?" I was disgusted and shocked at his words, them freezing me in place. This wasnt the Lucifer I knew, the man I loved. But time was running out, I could hear the killers footsteps coming closer from behind me. "Please! Help me!"

But he shook his head, stepping back before turning away, "goodbye Lorelai." He walked off, disappearing just as quickly as he had come. My breathing accelerated and I whipped around, coming face to face with the killer and the barrel of their gun.

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