to the people who will break my heart,
hello. it's me.
i've met a lot of you before, all disguised as strangers or people i just know. what i've come to know now is that i have a pattern with all of you. it might sound familiar, so let me know if it rings a bell in your mind.
i don't know you. we just smile when we walk past each other in whatever scenario life gives us.
i finally say something to you, or you say something to me, or someone says something to the both of us. we suddenly start to talk and pour out the hopes and dreams we want to achieve.
i start talking to you whenever i see you. i might have your number and start texting you, or vice versa. i might have classes with you and hope that you sit down next to me. i might have events with you where i hope you wander over and start up a conversation.
i realize that you're cute, both inside and out, and i would like to hold your hand.
you might have freckles. i honestly love freckles. they're like a connect-the-dots puzzles that i want to draw out with my finger. i love puzzles, too. my love for freckles probably thrives from the need to complete the drawing.
you might have an athletic body. i honestly love fit people. as someone who doesn't mind getting their hands dirty with some competitive sports, i would hope you share the same love of running as me.
you might have an academic mind. i honestly love smart people. i think they're all gifted in many different ways, and, hell, i can actually talk to you about the struggles of being a straight-a student and you won't judge me.
you might have seen me at my worst.
let's take a walk down memory lane, shall we ?
bitter boy made me cry and witnessed first hand the horrors of a ten year old having a panic attack in front of him.
i popped my earbuds in to drown out the noise that my friends were producing, tears in my eyes as i stare and make eye contact with forgetful guy.
"happy" girl was on the receiving end of a series of text messages i sent in the middle of the night, where i told her i *** ** **** *** **** ***-
enough of that. i don't like thinking about "happy" girl.
the point is, if you're receiving this, that means i found something out.
you don't want to hold my hand back.
it might be because you're already dating someone, which i probably didn't know about
it might be because you called or texted me, crying over your own crush and asking for comfort
it might be because you've made it pretty fucking clear that you don't like anyone
it might be because you flat out told me you don't like me after i told you
thank you for breaking my heart, everyone.
if i truly liked you, i would have felt honored to be crushed by your hands.
the hands i can't hold.
lots of bittersweet love,
francesca
