The Stoner & The Blind Girl

Part 40

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"There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn't true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true."

 -Soren Kierkegaard

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Do you ever feel like you are about to do something that is going to ruin your entire life?

That's how I felt right now.

I knew that what I was about to do was wrong, but I couldn't stop myself from doing it anyway.

The front door I stood in front of swung open.

"Wow, I'd say I am surprised to see you here but I knew you'd be crawling back eventually," Ashley said looking at me tiredly.

Her hair tied back and away from her face.

"I'm not crawling back," I said softly as I looked away from her.

"Let me guess, Emma doesn't know you're here," Ashley said letting me in.

I still couldn't believe it. Emma had dumped me.

I deserved it. She asked me not to do one thing and I did it anyway. Here I was about to do it again.

"Are you going to tell her I am?" I said brushing past her.

"Why would I ruin all the fun?" She asked me back softly.

I walked into the living room as Ashley trailed behind me. I hated to admit I had been here enough times to remember the layout at this point.

"You know it's like 4 am?" Ashley asked me as she laid down on the couch.

I sat down on the loveseat across from her. I struggled to sit still.

"Oh," I mumbled.

Without my phone, I had no way to know the time.

"Let me guess, you want more pills?" Ashley asked as she raised her brow.

I looked away from her.

"Do you have anything stronger?" I mumbled.

I needed something stronger. I needed more. It didn't matter how many pills I took. I never got the same buzz I did the first time. The buzz I did get never lasted as long.

"Are you sure about that?"

I turned back to her. She had an emotion I couldn't place swimming in her eyes.

I nodded slowly.

She said nothing before getting up and walking out of the room. Most likely to get the drugs.

I looked around the room. For once it looked relatively normal. Like a family could actually live there, except there was no family. Just Ashley, she hardly mentioned her parents and they never seemed to be around.

It was strange to think that after all this time, I still knew close to nothing about Ashley's life outside of the drugs.

I was snapped out of my thoughts as Ashley walked back into the room carrying a small black backpack.

She dropped the bag on the coffee table.

I quickly grabbed it. Itching to get into an altered state.

I wanted to get high enough that I could forget who I was. I needed to get high enough to forget.

I pulled out a small plastic bag full of a white powder.

I glanced at Ashley but she said nothing as she just watched me.

I opened the small baggy.

"You snort it,"  Ashley said breaking her silence. I poured a small amount of the powder onto the table top.