Ghost Whisperer || T. Lupin ✔

{30}

( BRETT )

HOGWARTS
FEBRUARY, 2016

Brett regretted going to the party. He knows he had drank more before but he still got drunk. He still semi remembered what had happened but that's part of the reason he regretted it. He remembered dancing with some girl, then kissing her, then much more. Everything was blurry and the noise coming through a filter. It was like being under water. He tried to remember everything, but he knew it was no use. He was just glad he didn't have class the next day.

When he saw Emery the next day, she looked like a mess. Her face was pale, maybe a little green, her lips were a greyish blueish color, and she looked paranoid. Brett walked over to her and laid his hand light on her back but she still jumped. "What's wrong Em?"

"I'm fine." Her voice was clipped and sounded like she was about to throw up.

"I didn't ask if you were fine, I asked what's wrong."

"My body, it's... it's like it's fighting me or something. I got wasted last night. The only thing I remember was I puke blood and that was pretty early in the night. I think Olivia took me to Madam Pomfrey, she said this morning if I start throwing up blood again to go straight to her. I don't know what's happening to me, I don't know enough about this..." Brett started to rub her back as her face started to seem less green and more pale. "I have to go, I have to go read something." Emery slowly gets up from the table and makes her way out of the room.

"How much did you drink?" Brett turned around and saw Olivia Cavalli sitting there with a cup of tea.

"Shouldn't you be more worried about Emery?"

"I can be worried about more than one person at a time. How much did you drink?" Brett got up from the table and started to walk away but he could tell Olivia was following him. "How much?"

"None."

"Bullshit. Don't fuck with me Brett, I'm not the same girl I was. So how much did you drink last night?"

Brett turned sharply on his heel, something else he regretted but pulled himself together. He expected to see Olivia's soft eyes and careful look, but he faced someone sharper. Her eyes burning with the words 'try me' engraved in them. "I got smashed, I drank enough that I wouldn't be surprised if I was still drunk. I made stupid mistakes. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

"All I want is the truth. Why did you drink?"

"Because I could. Because no one was going to stop me, because I wanted to lose control. I was off the rails last night, and I loved it, I had fun. I didn't have to worry about anything and that was one of the best moments of my life."

"You don't have to be wasted to lose control, to be off the rails, to have fun. C'mon, I'll show you." Olivia held out her hand. She wasn't smiling, her face was void of emotion and it looked like a completely different person than the one Brett used to know.

"What would you know about being off the rails, Ms. Perfect?"

Olivia sent him a wry smile and Brett was hit with just how different she is. "More than you would think. Join me or no?" Brett sighed and thought it over. "Don't think. Yes or no?"

This time, without any hesitation, "Yes." Brett took Olivia's hand and he ran with her up to the astronomy tower. "What are we doing up here?"

"Living. You wanna be off the rails? Then you have to do more than just exist, you have to live. Follow me." Olivia swung herself to the other side of the railing and held on with her hands. She pulled herself up to where she was standing on the outside and made her way to the side.

"What the hell am I doing?" Brett said before following Olivia. They both made it to the shingles on the castle and slid down until they were sitting close to the bottom and could balance out. Brett didn't dare look down.

Olivia took two things out from her pocket: a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. She pulled out a cigarette out of the pack and placed it into her mouth. She put the pack of cigarettes on her stomach before lighting the cigarettes and breathing in before taking the cigarette out and letting the smoke escape her mouth.

"Those things aren't good for you."

"Neither is drinking your liver away. Wanna try?"

Brett was about to say no, the word on the tip of his tongue, but then he remembered that he was trying to lose control. "Fuck it." He took the cigarette from her and breathed in the smoke. He immediately started coughing and his eyes watered.

"You breathed in wrong. Take a breath," Brett listened to the instructions. "Now breathe in the smoke so the it goes right here." He was able to do it this time without coughing his lungs out.

"How do you know how to do this?"

"Before I started trying to be perfect, I went through a phase of smoking and booze, anything to drown the memories. I did this in fourth year. Then I thought, when that didn't work, that I should try to be perfect to make my mum proud. Now that I've accepted that I can't be perfect and forgive myself, I think being off the rails is healthy. I want to fully live. What do you want Brett?" Brett took another drag from the cigarette as he thought over this question, his mind not helping him at all.

    "I... I don't know."

    "Then you should figure that out, otherwise you'll only be in misery."

100% one of my favorite chapters I have ever written for this book. Agree of disagree? I loved this chapter and I don't even know why.

Thanks

-April