Recovery // Seth Rollins

17

I knew from the little  internet research I did on the Seth Rollins' side of Colby that he didn't know his biological father, something we both had in common. I didn't speak of my family. Not to my therapist, my lecturers, or my classmates. My family were somewhat a rollercoaster that I decided not to ride anymore. I was essentially not just the youngest, but the runt of the family. And they made sure I knew it.

Through what Colby and I had been through in such a short time, I knew my family struggles and drama would be nothing compared to what happened last week. But I had never actually spoken about my family, they were a distant feature of my life that I wished to forget.

I looked up at Colby before readjusting to my position on his chest. "Well, basically from the start it was just me, my mum, my sister, and two brothers" I started.

"They were only my half siblings, their father is my mums ex husband."

I took a deep breath preparing myself for the road I was about to re visit. "I didn't get on with my half sister one bit. She was always making up stuff to tell my mother or nan that wasn't true. She was always making up lies about me."

"I was close to my brothers when I was growing up. Then when I got to high school, one moved to Sydney and the other moved down the other end of state so I barely saw him."

"I guess I was close to my grandparents, my nan taught me to cook. I was holding a wooden spoon from the moment I could scribble with a pen" I laughed at the distant memories of making pumpkin scones whilst sitting on a dining chair.

"But like everyone else, they moved away. They moved to Queensland when I was twelve, then I basically got use to everyone leaving."

Colby's arms squeezed around mine. "What about your dad?" He asked.

I closed my eyes. "I never knew my dad, I still don't. I would always ask, always, but I would always be told that I didn't need to know." I momentarily re lived each time I asked about my dad, where my dad was.

"At school I would always get jealous when other girl's dads would drop them off or pick them up. I use to cry and wonder why I wasn't good enough to have a dad." I whispered, gripping Colby's torso tightly.

"They didn't really care what I did, in fact they abused me for going to university."

Colby looked down at me in shock and confusion. "Why?"

"Because it was a waste of time and a waste of money" I repeated the words that was yelled at me many times.

"When it came to Nathaniel" I paused.
"They didn't even know, I didn't think they would have really cared" my voice came out barely a whisper. "They don't even know I'm here."

"Would you tell them about me?" Colby whispered.

My heart broke as he probably knew that I would never. "They wouldn't believe me" I whispered back, snuggling into his chest.

"Are you going to see them next week?" He asked, kissing my hair.

Next week we were off to my hometown and I actually hadn't thought about reaching out to my family.

"Um, I don't think so." I hadn't seen any member of my family in three years. I saw what they were doing on facebook and insragram, but I never actually had any physical contact with them. The last time I saw them was the day I left for uni. The hour drive was long and filled with tears.

"You won't take me to your hometown?" Colby asked, his eyes glimmering with hope.

"We're not going to my hometown, my hometown is three hours away from where the show is" I explained.