The Wolf Princess

Chapter 13: My Love From The Past

MIRA:

My mind were really bothered with questions. I knew it was not yet confirmed that he's dead but I'm still unsure if it's really him.

I didn't notice it much but they look alike, the only difference is their eyes and their hair which I also get confused when Sehun changes his hair color as he became a wolf.

But one thing is for sure, if it's him, he might recognize me in the first place.

I shrug the thoughts off and run through the corridor and knocks in every room I could pass.

"Mr.! Where are you?" I shouted as I continuously run and headed to this huge door.

I knocked once, then twice then I hardly hit it causing the door to open.

"Oh! So it's not locked." I mumbled.

I made my way in to this huge room whom I think is the master's bedroom.

I wander around. This room is bigger than mine with beige and gold accented wall and ceiling and a wooden tiled floor.

The furnitures were all wooden brown and the bed were covered with golden satin beddings and pillows.

The small table were on the right side of this huge bed with a golden lamp shade rested above it and this black picture frame.

I walk closely to the table to see clearly this two teens who's smiling happily as they hold each others hand.

I cupped my cheek and hold the tears that overflows from my shocked eyes.

So, it is really him.

I carefully pick the frame and held it on my chest pressing it hard to feel the cold glass that secures the old photograph.

I sobbed hard. I don't know what would I feel right now.

Would I be glad that he's still alive?

Would I be mad because he hide the truth from me?

But really, why does he hide the truth?

Does he knew that I am Mira, the girl he loved before? Or maybe he forgot about me that's why he doesn't recognize me when we met?

The door opened and there he is standing as he gazed at me dumbfounded.

"Mira..." he uttered half-whispered.

I craned my neck and face him with blurry eyes since I was still crying hard.

He walk closely and rested his both palms on my shoulder and slowly push me to the side of his bed causing me to land in my butt gently.

He seated next to me and cup my cheek. He gently graced his thumb on my cheek wiping the tears that still flowing though it.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hide. I'm afraid you will be mad at me the moment you know the truth. I'm sorry Mira. Please forgive me." he explained.

I averted my gaze to the other side since I can't face him due to mixed emotions that's welling up inside me.

He held my hand and gently squeeze it.

"Mira..Please.." he pleaded.

He stood up and kneeled in front of me, still his hands were lock on mine.

"I am not dead. I choose to hide because I'm afraid you'll get hurt if I choose to stay. I'm sorry Mira." he explained.

Tears were now rolling out of his eyes as he gazed at me with pleading expressions clearly written on his face.

"But why? Why did you hide? Why did you leave me? And why the hell you pretend that you're dead!" I yelled in anger.

Yes, I'm angry right now, hearing that he chose to hide from me I feel betrayed and abandoned.

"You didn't know how hard I tried to live without you. How miserable life was after you left me hanging alone without even explaining on why do you have to pretend that you're dead. I was hopeless the moment I knew you died. I've gone crazy since I can't believe you're really dead since there's no proof. Even you're body we're not seen." I sobbed hard.

He pull me into a hug and I push him but he won't budge.

I punch him on his back to at least ease the pain that was slowly boring like thousands of daggers on my chest.

"I'm sorry. I hope you'll forgive me." he whispered then kissed the top of my head.

I let the ache ceased as I let my bitter tears soaked his chest. The tear whom I hold on for five years just for him.

We stayed like this for a couple of minute as I continuously sob and let all my heartaches pour like a heavy rain from the sky.

He hold me tight, a hug which I longed for years. A hug which I think I would never experience again.

Seeing him again brings back the pain that I struggle to bury inside me. Like the rotten memories with him starts to swell and slowly infecting my numb heart.

And then, that day were he disappeared without even saying goodbye..

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"Luhan! Luhan!" I shouted, I was clearly terrified the moment I read his note.

The note that states that he's going to end his miserable life.

To my beloved Mira,

I'm sorry if I have to do this. I know it won't be easy for us to handle this but I need to. All of you will get hurt if I continuously struggle to live. I'm sorry Mira. I'm really sorry if I hurt you emotionally but this would be better than I hurt you physically. The moment you read this letter of mine I will be in my peaceful state. Let the god of heavens took care of my soul. I will be on your side guiding you no matter what. Someday you will know why I did this and I'll wait for you in that paradise when the right time came. I love you Mira, always and forever.

                                                      -Lu Han

My knees weaken like all the pain that burdens my soul suddenly drops to my skinny legs.

I cried hard like I was in a state of loosing my own self. Like I'm going to get insane.

I can't live without him. I love him that much that I am willing to give all that I have just to be with him.

But he leave me and killed himself without even explaining why.

Days, weeks, months have successfully passed. No body nor even a glimpse of his soul were shown.

I suffer a lot in dealing with this heartache. I haven't eaten for days and lock myself in my room and there's a time were I almost killed myself due to this unbearable pain.

I leave the place were the love that we had all started.

I move to the city and embrace the busy life. I started a new life there and forget all the pain that haunts me from the past.

I force myself to think that he's really dead, and yeah, I successfully overcome it not until this day. Coz again, I saw him, this man who caused too much pain on me, then this feeling again came back like a fire that slowly engulf my freezing soul from numbness that he caused due to abandoning me long time ago.

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"You're back Lu Han. You're really back." I whispered and hug him tightly.

"Yes Mira, and I won't let you go ever again. I love you." he whispered back and for the first time in years of longing for each other, we kissed with hunger and thirst clearly shown in every movement of our lips could take.

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Thanks for reading (*^﹏^*)

Janie (*^﹏^*)