Unmasked - A Swasan Story

12 # Tangled

Swara loved butterflies as a kid. The fluttering of those painted wings flitting from flower to flower like little fairies in colors, such a fascinating sight! Sometimes she wished to be one, fly and soar high... as her dreams and hopes did. Didn't they?

In reality, they had always been clipped, bound by limitations...and now broken.

That night hadn't been easy for Swara. The stream of tears seemed never-ending as the pain of her aching heart. One word... Just one word from him, she had no clue would crush her world.

Haan!

And she froze on spot ...all she could feel was deadly numbness for next few minutes deprived of every feeling and sensation. Then she felt, a sharp stab right into the heart. Tears pooled in her eyes and all of sudden everything felt blurry.

Thanks to Ragini ,who as usual came to her aid. She cited some excuse, Swara had no clue what! Voices around reached her ears in bits and pieces and she couldn't make sense of a single word. Ragini held her hand and she blindly followed.

Back in the car, Ragini didn't say a word...they drove in silence. Thankfully, she was led to Gadodia house, straight to the terrace.

"Aaj hum tumhe nahi rokenge, Swara. Jitna rona hain rolo," said Ragini and restrained tears of Swara found their way out. Ragin simply held Swara close in silence.

In midst sobs, Swara murmured she had no clue why she felt this bad on hearing Sanskaar's love for someone else. It's not like they are even together. She didn't have hopes of any. He was an unattainable dream ...that's it. She was well aware, he had never been hers or could never be. Then why was it killing her from inside?

"It's because you love him, he doesn't and sometimes unrequited love is worst kind of pain," Ragini said.

Love? Did her love ever make sense like her mindless fascination for Sanskaar? No matter how much ever she wished for him badly, she always had clear lines drawn between dream and reality. Where did she go wrong then?

Last few weeks with him around, she didn't even realize blurring few lines or many and had been living in a dreamy reality, giving into her momentary fancies, false hopes until harsh reality came crashing down to her, today. She felt bad, then angry over that nonexistent face, who claimed Sanskaar's heart, then terrible over her state of mind and wretched heart.

Did she have a right to complain? No, she didn't. Not when she called this upon herself. None is to be blamed other than her. The sand castles were bound to be to washed away one day, she should have known.

"Sanskaar doesn't have a clue of your feelings, Swara. You never had any intentions to let him know and now it's too late." Ragini's every word made sense... every word. "It's a wake-up call, Swara. It time for you to move on from, Sanskaar."

Move on? That felt like a death sentence. Move on from him? Swara dreaded the prospect. Would that ever be possible? She nodded no. For the first time in years, Ragini lost her cool over Swara's adamant stance.

"It's just a matter of few more weeks, Swara. Your internship will end. Even if you are placed in Maheswari Inc. is there a way? He wouldn't have an idea of your craziness and would get married to someone he loves aur tera kya? How long, Swara? How long? Days? months,?years? How long will you hold on to this fascination? Step out of your dream world, Swara. Please. You can't go on like this. It's not too late yet, Swara. Please wake up."

Swara blinked through tears feeling lost. Ragini sighed sadly over her friend's state.

"I know it's not going to be easy ... And I can't even imagine how tough it is going to be for you to give on someone you loved so dearly all these years ...but it's time." She told calmly this time.