To Lose Control

Chapter 2

3rd Person

Taylor sighed as he dragged himself into small apartment. The apartment was just fine for him, but it was still visibly small.

He dropped his stuff on the floor, made sure to lock the door, and trudged himself to his room. It was the only bedroom in the apartment, but that was understandable considering the size of the apartment anyway.

As soon as Taylor got to his room, he dropped himself onto his not so soft and comfortable bed. He couldn't help but let his mind wander to how much of a wreck and mess he was. After such depressing thoughts, he gathered the courage to stand up and take his pills.

Taylor took pills because sometime, well most of the times he would get episode where he'd start feeling sad and horrible out of no where. He had bipolar disorder to put it simply. He couldn't sleep very well at night either. So, to help with that, he'd take sleeping pills too.

He wasn't  proud of his problem, but he couldn't really do anything about it. He most of all didn't like the word depressed. He refused to use it to describe how he felt, because to him it was almost like admitting defeat. He'd rather use the word drained. That was how he felt.

Even so, he couldn't help but feel better than he did about a year ago. That was mostly due to him leaving his first job. He felt very relieved after leaving, and he wants to start fresh. He wants to try being a happy person.

After taking his pills, Taylor intensely stared at my bed . He didn't like sleeping and he did everything to avoid it. Sleeping just meant another terrible nightmare. Unfortunately for him though, he couldn't avoid it this time, because he had work the next morning.

Taylor's head hung low, as he walked over to his bed. He almost felt like a child who was being punished. He wanted to cry, so that was exactly what he was going to do until he fell asleep.

The next morning, Taylor stared at himself through the slightly dirty mirror.  He just stared thoughtlessly and he would've stayed a bit longer if it wasn't for the fact that he had work to get to.

Snapping out of his trance, Taylor quickly dressed himself. He had already taken a shower earlier before getting caught up in his own reflection.

Today, he decided to he was going to leave all his negative and broken emotions in his small apartment and not bring them with him to work. The last thing he needed was for Mr. Stones seeing him as incapable of the job. Taylor really needed the money, and he couldn't afford to lose such a rare opportunity because of his emotion.

It was getting late, so Taylor rushed out his apartment building.

By the time he arrived to his new job's building, he was certainly out of breath. Now he understood how tired Hannah was the other day.

Taking a deep breath, Taylor threw all the remaining emotions out the window, and walked into the building. He tried his hardest to look as confident as ever, but he knew he was failing miserably. Nevertheless, he felt confident that his facial expression didn't show any signs of sadness. That was good enough for him, for now.

After making it to the forth floor by elevator, Taylor swiftly made his way to the chair at his cubical. His cubical was identical to every other cubical in the room. They were all plain and simply boring. He almost didn't know which was his.

"Taylor!" Hannah was happy to see him, but she had news that she didn't know whether it was good or bad. Taylor looked up at her smiling the best he can. "Oh, Good Morning." she smiled. "Anyway, I have news for you." she said, still smiling. Taylor raised an eyebrow at her motioning for her to continue. She laughed " Oh, sorry I just love leaving people wondering!"

Taylor didn't even know how she could smile any wider than she was, but she managed. " He gave her an unamused look, which she sighed heavily to. "Fine, fine. I'll tell you, but you're no fun." she huffed playfully. "Yes, so Mr. Stones wants to see you."

Taylor's heart skipped a beat. Why did he want to see him? Was he getting fired, because Mr. Stones saw he wasn't good enough for the job? Taylor internally cursed himself for always thinking of the worst scenarios, but you couldn't blame him, he'd been through a lot.

Taylor gets a lot of panic attacks, and he was starting to have one. His panic attacks were another reason why he took pills. Hannah started getting worried. " Taylor, are you ok?" she asked. He weakly nodded laying his head on his desk, trying to get his breathing under control.

He'd forgotten his pills at home, and he didn't have any at the moment.

Mr. Stones was at his desk. Waiting patiently. Or trying to wait patiently for Taylor's attendance. He stared at the door hard. He was getting upset. Very upset.

He'd finally got enough. He didn't like to be kept waiting. Standing from his chair harshly, he sent his chair flying to the wall behind him. Grabbing an item from his desk, he walked around his desk, and stormed out his office.

He reached to Taylor's desk, and was surprised by what he saw. "My pills." Taylor mumbled weakly, barely audibly, but Mr. Stones heard him. Taylor hadn't even noticed it was missing the night before when he took his other pills.

Mr. Stones had found pills yesterday on his office floor. It had fallen out of Taylor's pocket, when he left. Mr. Stones thought they were drugs he was taking illegally, so he called Taylor to his office.

He threw the pills to Taylor, but Taylor had already passed out.-Mr. Stones paced around his office not knowing what to do. This had never happened before. He didn't know what to do. What would he tell the ambulance when they came?

He was considering to fire Taylor after he was out of the hospital. He didn't want to be responsible for his health. What if it happened again? He wasn't taking any chances.

Eventually the ambulance had come. They assured everyone that Taylor just fainted, but Mr. Stones was still planning on firing him after all this was over.

He sat in his office chair thinking. After thinking long and hard, Mr. Stones realized it was getting dark out. He wanted to go home after such a long day. Finally getting up from his seat, Mr. Stones grabbed his belongings as he dialed a number.

"Yes, bring the car out front." he said into the phone. His voice was serious and stern. With that, he walked out of his office and walked his way to his car that was waiting outside for him.

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Hope you enjoyed the chapter!

drousyy♡