Forgiveness: [Jay X Reader]

Four.

My bloody fists pounded on the metal door, the sound harsh to my ears.

My screams ripped my vocal cords raw, and each breath felt like swallowing sandpaper.

Tears clouded my vision, and I sunk to the floor.

"JAY! JAY HELP ME

THEY'RE GOING TO KILL ME

JAY!"

My voice echoed throughout my hollow chamber of fear and pain.

I had hurt him. My friend. My silly little friend. I don't know how to treat a friend.

I rested my forehead against the door, the cold metal harsh against my scarred skin.

From the other side of the door, I heard footsteps and ragged breathing. I lifted my head, my palm pressed against the door. "Jay?"

The breathing hitched and more tears spilled onto the floor.

"I'm here." He hissed from the other side of the door, his tone cold.

"Jay please please get me out of here! I can't think I can't breathe the voice-the voice keeps talking to me and I can't say no anymore..."

"What did I do to you deserve what you did to me?" The question fell on my cold ears, odd and foreign.

"What?"

"You hurt me, you said you would kill me."

What?

"What? I never did such a thing-"
He cut me off with a grumble.

"You liar! You broke my nose and my eye is swollen shut. What is wrong with you?"

I gasped and retracted from the door. "It-it wasn't me! It's the voice-the voice! They keep talking to me! I listened and I hurt you?" It wasn't meant to be phrased as a question, but I asked anyways.

"Why should I believe you?" His tone was cold and harsh and I looked down at my hands.

"You can't. I'm a ticking time bomb, waiting to explode. I'm going to kill someone. I was going to kill you. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I was going to kill you. Im so sorry imsosorry..." I began to bawl, and I started blubbering, my words indecipherable.

Above my whining, a click sounded in the room and I crawled back from the door. "No no! Don't come in! Don't get near me!" I screamed, my voice hoarse as I backed away. "I'm going to hurt you! I don't want to, I'm so sorry so so sorry..."

I held my face in my hands and curled up on the floor, cold and pitiful. I didn't mean it. I wouldn't hurt him. Never. The voice... I can't control myself.

I stiffened as I felt someone pick me up and sat down in my place on the floor, me curled in their lap.

I blinked my eyes open to see Jay, his ginger locks curly and wily as ever. His blue eyes brimmed and spilled over with tears which slid over his bruised and contorted face.

I gasped and I lightly traced my finger over his bruised nose. "I did that?" My voice was barely a whisper, and I choked on my tears.

He flinched at my touch, but didn't pull away. A simple nod and I covered my mouth with a hand.

"Sh it's okay." He held my shaking form close to his chest, and I leaned into him.

"How can you do this? How can you be so nice to me and I've hurt you so much?"

"Everyone needs a second chance. You don't know what you're doing. But, I've forgiven you."

I nodded and leaned my forehead into the crook of his neck.

I was being touched by someone else.

And they weren't intending to kill me.

"I talked to Sensei about your condition, and he and his brother went to go get you medicine today. So that means you get to be happy again." I nodded against his chest, silently listening.

"It's going to make you feel better. You have two different personalities, you and..."

"The voice."

"Right. The medicine will take away the voice." His hand drew circles and spirals on my back, a soothing motion. 

I nodded and let myself sleep in his embrace.

The next day, he returned to give me the medicine. A sleek white pill which rolled around in the palm of my hand.

Jay watched me fiddle with it before he looked up at my eyes. "Take it."

A wary glance at him then back at the pill, and I swallowed it with a lick of water.

Instantly, his face lit up and he smiled. "You're going to get so much better and we can give you a real life!" He threw his hands up in the air and spun, overly excited.

I followed his lead and smiled. "Could I meet the rest of your friends? And eat spaghetti? I've never had spaghetti. Or pet a dog. Can I go meet a dog? Dogs are nice, right?"

Jay smiled and took my hands in his. "We can go to the zoo and see all of the animals you want and my friends can come too and have spaghetti for dinner!"

He giggled and spun me around happily, and I laughed in return.

I was going to get better.