Changing Relations ✔

Chapter 54

Ashen faced, I clung to the orange plastic bucket as if it were a life raft. My stomach felt like the bag in a set of bag-pipes being vigorously squeezed. With a heaving lurch of my stomach another small mouthful of bile dribbled from my quivering lips into the waiting pool of rancid vomit.

Sickness so often comes in waves rather than simply one thing at a time, yet in those long stretches of health I never think how healthy things happen in bunches too, building me higher and stronger. I guess it's all about making the most of the good stuff and letting the bad stuff pass by as if it were elevator music. So, this pain, this vomit, these muscle aches and head pain that comes as a slowly building bruise... it's all part of living, of reminding me to value health and care for those who ail.

I was so tired that I closed my eyes and simply leaned on the head rest. There were thousands of things running in my mind, but I've decided. Finally, I've took the decision to tell Zain, about my sickness. I'll explain to him as to why I hid it from him.

I'll let him choose my fate although my fate was already written by the best planner.

I was suppose to meet Dr.Khan today and also collect my reports from her but I didn't went because I want to go with Zain. I know him well enough, that, just to see me perfectly alright he'll do anything for me.

But this isn't a small thing. I only pray that he understands my point. But anyways, there won't be a solution to this problem because he can't love me and I'm not ready without his love.

Giving a break to all my positive and negative thoughts, I tried to take a nap. Just as I was about to go into a deep slumber, I heard a loud whaling sound piercing through the walls. It was hard to believe it came from such a tiny creature, I wanted to go back to sleep and ignore it but it was impossible.

It sounded like the screeching of an angry cat, only growing harsher and louder as I walked to stop the wailing.
I looked down at his balled up red face, eyes frantically searching the room for my familiar face, and when his eyes landed on me the crying diminished and he giggled, as if waking me up was a joke. I sighed.

"What happened, Adeel?" I asked crouching down to his level.

"Misshhwwiing eeww" I laughed at his sentence. He's twenty months old now and learning to speak.

"Mumma was up in her room na, you know na that I wasn't well?" I said brushing his bangs away, which were falling down to his eyes. Yes, he has bangs, courtsey, Zain!!

And Yes, he calls me Mumma. No one taught him, but he started saying on it's own.

"Dadda?" He asked pouting.

"Must be on his way." I said kissing his cheek. He turned and went away to play.

"Assalamualaikum" Zain's voice boomed across the large living room. He looked so stressed. His tie was hanging low, his hair was stucking out from all different places, his eyes were bloodshot red as if, as if he has cried?

"Walekumasalam" I smiled taking his bag from him, he only nodded.

"Dadda" Adeel came running towards him and he picked him up in his arm.

"How are you my son?" He asked kissing his cheeks.

"Goosh and eeewww?" He asked.

"Hahaha...good. You didn't trouble your Mumma?" He asked. And oh so innocently! Adeel nodded his head. Liar!! I mentally said.

"You should freshen up" I said. He nodded and went to his room. I sighed.

Mission telling him the truth cancelled.