I need a new laptop

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Me: *goes to print something* (which by the way took about an hour to find (through no fault of my own))

Status of printer: offline

Me: WTF

Me: but I turned it on!

Me: *restarts laptop*

Status of printer: still f**ckin offline

Me: FUUUUUUUUU

Me: *removes printer from 'devices and printers'*

Me: *adds printer (again)*

Status of printer: Ready

Me: yay

Me: *prints document*

Printer: *doesn't print*

Me: WTF

Me: *troubleshoots printer*

Laptop: "A document was preventing another document from printing" (or some b*lls**t like that)

Laptop: "error was fixed"

Me: *goes back to document*

Status of printer: Error

Me: WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF THE ERROR OBVIOUSLY WAS NOT FIXED, WAS IT? 

Me: YOU PIECE OF C**P JUST PRINT MY F**KIN PIZZA ROLLS RECIPE

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