02/12/2018
Calm down.
It's the fever, it's the fever.
Yeah of course, blame it on the fucking fever when you don't want to own up to your true feelings.
You have been feeling like this for the past three weeks or so, and you only stop ignoring the obvious when you know you can blame it on the fever.
I'm struggling, but it's the fever.
I feel like shit, but it's the fever.
I'm hurting, but it's the fever.
I'm exhausted, but it's just the fever.
It's funny how many excuses the human brain can come up with when you need to explode so, after you do, you can go on with your life like nothing happened.
Like you weren't struggling when you didn't have a fever.
Like you didn't feel like shit when you didn't have fever.
Like you weren't hurting when you didn't have a fever.
Like you weren't exhausted when you didn't have fever.
At least I have been having a lot of fevers in the past few days...
Now that I have a fever I could talk about the fear I have been facing, but in the end I know I need this fear to protect myself from the world. But fear does not protect me from myself.
The lack of communication not only within myself but also with other people, the need of more but not wanting to ask for it.
The fact that I have never felt more unloved, unwanted, unworthy.
The fact that I am so afraid of hurting others that all I do is hurt myself or let myself get hurt without complaining. Again and again and again.
But you're not going to talk about all of that because you know that it's only the fever making you feel so bad.
The fever. Yes, of course. You're probably right.
My world's collapsing, but it's the fever.
ESTÁS LEYENDO
Pieces of Me.
No FicciónHi there, how are you? I hope you're okay. Like the title says, this book is made of pieces of me, sort of like a diary. Each chapter has its topic, message and feeling. I write it as my life goes on, pouring my heart out, mentioning a lot of the...
