The STD Trace

17. What's Love Got to Do with It?

Hm... it seems as if my story is now all of a sudden rated R so.... I'm a little frustrated. I sent in a request to Wattpad but they haven't gotten back to me yet. If they say my story has to be Rated R then... I swear I may stop writing because that is just frustrating. It will piss me off. Whatever. Here is your chapter. Gets a tad emotional and then a tad raunchy. Enjoy :) Stay STD free <3

Love was very much in the air, strong and poignant. It was cute and it made me envious. I wanted that and I wouldn’t be having it anytime soon for a couple of reasons. See, I’m a list maker and I’m constantly one of those people that use memos on their cell phones to record my thoughts. Good thing I’m not suicidal because then I’d write suicide notes. Wait, that has nothing to do with— Okay, so here are my reasons.

One, I keep kissing people. What woman in the world that was loved kissed multiple guys and enjoyed it? Um… thinking, thinking, thinking… NO ONE. Like, I have a serious problem here. My lips should not land on everyone’s lips. My hands should not touch everyone’s body parts. And seriously, my eyes need to stop gazing at others. There should only be one man that matters, jeez!

Two, I lost my virginity to the perfect guy and yet I keep looking and poking around with others. Why can’t I stay put with this one guy and be happy? Come on, I gave such great advice to Maggie and then can’t even apply it to my own life. Well, the only difference was that I wasn’t this super popular chick or what not. But still, it would be nice if I just let one guy in and one guy only.

Three, my STD tracing made it impossible to cut off contact with multiple people. Maybe if I didn’t have to talk to so many people then I’d stay under the radar. I missed the old me where I had no worries but school. Yet, I like the friends I have made and the impact I’ve had on lives.

Four, my mother was so called in love with my teacher. Like… that ruins my outlook on life. How can I love anyone when my mother was such a slorebag? And a preggo slorebag at that. Yeah… so much for a great example, mother. So much for showing me the way of life and how to acquire a guy the right way. Good thing I have Lucas in my life or I would be screwed for sure.

Five, I’m in freaking high school. I don’t even need to be in love in the first place. Can you say… Depressing? Wow, I’m officially screwed with this concept of love. I don’t want to be a sappy romantic or anything, but… I don’t want to be alone forever. Cat ladies ain’t cute, you know? Like being alone was not attractive unless you were a slore that slept with random guys in bars and stuff. If not, then being single was no bueno.

Maggie threw back her head and laughed, swatting at Alden’s arm. Yeah, he was at my house and they were “hanging out.” I think I should keep an eye on them—sex was not something I recommended for people her age. Alden was adorable and Maggie was such a cuter person when he was around. Maggie was such a cuter person when she was truly happy. Sighing, I poured myself a glass of water and leaned up against the counter, sipping from my glass.

“A lot on your mind?” Lucas leaned against the counter next to me, his eyes on Maggie and Alden flirting over their homework.

“I think I’m doing something wrong…” I tapped my fingers against my cold glass.

“In what way?”

“Like… Okay, don’t freak out, alright?” I bit my lip.

“Okay…”

“I had sex.”

Lucas’ hands went white and he turned to me, eyes wide. “W-what?”

“Oh, come on! You have sex all the time!” I protested.